“Now, that we have come to the last episode, would you like to say a few words?” He handed the microphone to me.

“When I first started this story, I really didn’t know if people will like it. I named it Colored Rhythms because I meant to say that life, like dance, has many colors and rhythms. This story only told of some of these colors. I believe I mentioned long ago that I had meant to write this story in a simple manner so everyone can read it easily. The story only starts to get deeper after the first few chapters and if you read closely enough, you will find a lot more things in it than it looks on the surface. I hope these few specials have helped you to gain a new understanding of the story and if you should ever read back again, that you may read the story in a different angle this time.”

“I would also like to add for her that the wordpress site is now fully updated. She is still finetuning the alignment here and there but the story’s all there so remember to ask your friends to visit. Oh if you have read the previous comments, you would also know who her mysterious French translator is. The first few chapters for the French site has also started running.” Kang Ho Dong rattled off cheerfully.

A round of applause rose around the seats which surprised me. “Thank you.” I smiled as I looked around my cast. “It will be a long episode today because we will look at the relationships between Ji Hye and the men in her life and of course Boa and Junsu.”

“Who shall we start with first?” Kang Ho Dong looked around in anticipation.

“Let’s start with Ji Hye and Yunho.” I sat down beside Yunho.

“Ji Hye and Yunho’s relationship would have been perfect if they could have dealt with their inner demons. They shared an intense connection because of their love for dance. The attraction and chemistry between them is undeniable. Their attraction is further amplified with an element of lust and desire for each other. If you were to ask me to choose, Yunho would have been the closest to being Ji Hye’s soulmate. The magic of their relationship can be seen in the times they needed little words for communication as well as the magic they shared while dancing. This was based on a real story and a person I met in real life.”

I sighed.

“Unfortunately, Yunho had his own issues to deal with and by the time he wanted to try, it was too late. He was torn by his own fears and confusions with regards to his sexuality. In a romantic drama, she would accept him again but reality is otherwise. Once a crack has appeared in a relationship, it is often hard to erase. It was one of those ‘it could have been’ cases. Some of you also felt that perhaps they were not meant to be together even though we all knew they had something special. Sometimes we meet the right person but the time simply isn’t right. You can look at their relationship in this way.”

I turned to Yunho and looked at him before I looked to the rest again.

“However, I would also look at it in another way and that is Yunho did not love her enough. He did not love her enough to overcome his own selfishness and cowardice. Sometimes we would like to make excuses for the men’s misgivings but truth is, sometimes they just didn’t love you enough. This is the hard truth that many women can’t face up to which Ji Hye eventually found the strength to see. This is not just for men. Women can be cruel too. Of course, we must not forget Yunho’s character. For all you know, they might split up eventually even if I had put them together. However, I wanted Yunho to be the one to round up the story nicely so he was eventually the one that brought Ji Hye to her happiness.”

“I am sorry, Yunho. As much as it hurt me, I was really touched by the two breakup scenes Ji Hye and you had.” I rested my head on his shoulder. He ruffled my hair and smiled.

“One instance of how a man has suffered is Junsu. One can see how his bubbly self was affected by his unrequited love for Ji Hye. He’s so sweet to her and yet never got reciprocated. This is human nature. We sometimes take for granted the things and people that come to us easily. Ji Hye probably knew of his heart long ago but she chose to ignore it in the fear of losing his friendship because she knew she didn’t love him in that way. It didn’t help that while Junsu had the courage to dream, he didn’t have the courage to confess.”

I looked at Junsu sadly. Slight tears were running in Kang Ho Dong’s eyes.

“Many of you agree with me that we are guilty of this in real life as well. We may proclaim what a waste it would be if we were to let go of a man like Junsu but more often than not, we do. In Junsu’s case, he finally found the courage to leave when the pain got too much. I wanted to give Junsu reprieve for having been deprived of her presence in his life for so long thus, I arranged for them to meet again. This was also his second chance. However, love and friendship is different and both of them knew sympathy was not what Junsu wanted.” Junsu nodded quietly.

“Yes I totally understand.” Kang Ho Dong patted Junsu’s shoulder.

“This brings me to the coupling all of you have been asking for. Let me ask all of you a question. Do you think it is possible for Junsu to like Boa immediately after he had spent 3 years of his life loving Ji Hye?”

I paused for a while as the studio went silent.

“If the ending had been Junsu liking Boa, it would not have been him. It would not have been the Junsu that we have all come to love. Thus, it was only possible for me to end it the way it did. He was finally able to realize that it was time for him to let go and open his heart but not possible for him to accept Boa immediately. I would have betrayed Junsu’s character if I had done so. Boa is also trying to grapple with her feelings for Junsu after not seeing him for so long, thus it could not have gone further than it did.”

I spotted Junsu and Boa looking down awkwardly.

“I am sure with Junsu’s willingness to try and Boa’s desire to discover more about those feelings, something good will happen, won’t it?” I winked at both of them who looked up at me.

“Now, we can finally come to the relationship that had kept many readers on the edge of their seats.” I giggled. Kang Ho Dong rubbed his palms together gleefully.

“A lot of the events that happened to Jae Joong and Ji Hye had been based upon the rumored life and romances of a certain famous Hallyu star and of course Jae Joong himself. When Ji Hye first met Jae Joong, she still had fresh scars from her breakup with Yunho. Thus, she was not looking for love at that point and certainly not with Jae Joong who was younger than her. The relationship grew from Jae Joong’s confinement to a small world due to his growing popularity. The loneliness and stress of his work made him vulnerable. Ji Hye’s presence became a pillar of realism and support to him. Thus, he was also unknowingly reliant on her emotional support. Jae Joong was slowly helping Ji Hye to deal with her past pains as well. This was how their relationship grew deeper. However, they were both not aware of this until Yunho came into the picture again and threatened to change the balance between them.”

“I wonder who’s this Hallyu star you are talking about.” Kang Ho Dong wondered aloud. “He will remind you of the weather.” I replied. He laughed out on realizing who I was talking about.

“Jae Joong’s boyishness was shown in his sudden outbursts towards and yet he also showed maturity at the same time by not forcing Ji Hye to accept him against her will in the beginning. Instead, he waited patiently. While he was also unsure about his love for Ji Hye, he was a lot clearer about wanting to face it than Yunho did. As they fell in love, they faced a different set of problems from lacking time to meet each other, to scandals, temptations and hiding from the rest. It was difficult for them to have a relationship.”

“Oh I heard Song Hye Rin giving you praises for your kissing!” Kang Ho Dong chuckled.

“Thank you very much for volunteering that information.” Jae Joong glared. He turned to Ji Hye and grabbed her face as he planted his lips on hers for a lip lock that lasted a whole minute. The whole studio gasped.

“Jae Joong, this is national television!” I screamed.

“They will edit it… It’s always best with you.” He grinned at Ji Hye who was now so embarrassed she could not lift her face.

I tried to regain my composure as I continued “Their relationship was first tested when Hye Rin entered the picture. Up to this point, both of them were still unsure what they meant to each other. Thus, this was an important catalyst in their relationship. We all know what happened after that.” I laughed.

“Wah Jae Joong I never knew how brave you were. I could hardly believe what happened when you came back from Japan to look for her but judging from that kiss just now, I believe it! That wasn’t the only time was it?” Kang Ho Dong sni.ggered.

“Wha..what? Do I have to answer this?!” Jae Joong stuttered.

“Look at him grabbing her on national television. I bet that messy trail of clothes was not the only time.” Yoo Chun laughed loudly.

“YOO CHUN!!!” Ji Hye was completely red in the face which made Yoo Chun laugh even more. Even Jae Joong looked embarrassed.

“Jae Joong knew he could not acknowledge her in public and thus offered a ring as a proof of his love. Even when they got found out, there was little he could do. Thus, this brings me to an important theme in their relationship.” Everyone sat up and paid attention.

“Both of them were people who lived for their dreams. While they love each other, the real test came when the decision had to be made between their dreams and their love for each other. They were both young and had a bright future ahead of them. It is easy for anyone to ask them to give it all up for love, but when the real crunch comes, is it really that easy to throw your dreams away in the name of love?” I asked firmly.

“In their case, they both knew inside they couldn’t. Thus, Ji Hye did the painful thing of breaking up with him. Jae Joong knew Ji Hye would be hurt if he stayed with her and that she will wilt if she gave her dreams up for him. Thus, he could not make himself stop her from leaving. Their love had overcome all other obstacles but failed in the face of their own dreams. They had lost to themselves. Letting go of each other was their way of loving each other at that point of time. This was also based on a personal true story. That’s why I still cry sometimes from listening to Somewhere Down The Road.”

“Yes they say sometimes letting go is also love.” Kang Ho Dong said with a surprising softness in his voice.

“As time passed and they fought for their dreams, the question came again when all four parties met back in Seoul. At this point of time, Junsu had already made his stand. Ji Hye was trying to forget Jae Joong and move on. Jae Joong was denying that he was still affected by her while Boa was surprised by the emotions she felt on seeing Junsu. Boa’s scandal with Jae Joong was a thorn that poked at Ji Hye’s feelings. The scene which summarized the entire situation was in the scene where the four of them stood on opposite ends with Se7en singing in between. The words of the song somehow fitted everyone’s thoughts at that time even though they were all different.” The four of them nodded in agreement.

“Ji Hye was apprehensive and lost towards her feelings for Jae Joong. After all, three years had already passed. Junsu knew he was fighting a losing battle just like Jae Joong knew he had already lost the battle in trying to deny himself. Boa was still unsure of her feelings thus she had given the tickets to Junsu not so much out of trying to get the two together so that she can have Junsu. She was doing it because she had seen Jae Joong’s pain during the years while Ji Hye was away. So there you go, that was why the story ended this way.” I smiled widely as I knew the end was near.

“On a side note, the ending climatic song Jae Joong sang was honestly an accidental discovery but it was so fitting! The speech that Jae Joong gave was partly based on a declaration that the Hallyu star had made sometime back as well as what he had said in his concerts.”

“How do you feel now that the story is truly ending?” Kang Ho Dong asked.

“I feel a little sad because Colored Rhythms was a big part of my thoughts from the time it started till today. I have made new friends, met readers from all over the world and it’s been such a satisfying journey. I have such great contributions in terms of artwork and comments that I cannot say how lucky I am.” I felt tears rising to my eyes. “Thank you very much. I really thank all of you. If I had not started writing this and had your support all this time, I don’t think I would have discovered how much I love writing.” I bowed to the camera.

“Do you have plans for other stories?”

“Yes I do. In fact, I have ideas for three stories. I will be working on two of them first. However, I don’t know if you guys will like it because they will look at different themes and the settings will be very different as well. I also hope to explore these themes more deeply so the story may be more mature than Colored Rhythms had been. The first story that I have launched is called Midnight City. It is my attempt at serious fiction and it will be quite different from this story. The other that will be launched soon is called Café De Providence, which is a slightly lighter story. I hope you guys will like it. Please do have a read if you can!”

Our faces fell as we knew the program was coming to an end.

“As I promised when we started the specials, I have something special for all of you. Please look at the screen behind.” I pointed to the screen and the camera zoomed in. It was a video taken in an unknown garden location.

*At Unknown Garden Location*

It was a sunny day. The cool breeze was flowing through the air as it brought along the aromas of freshly prepared pastries and delicious meals. While the sun graced the occasion with its warm lighting, the wind had kept us nicely cool.

The grass was green and neatly groomed for the occasion. White roses were arranged in beautiful stands all around the circular garden. Soft music was being played in the background from a grand piano that had been set up in a nearby gazebo. There were people dressed in suits running around to set up the food and final decorations.

There were tables all round the garden which had been lined with rich white fabrics. The soft tinkling of plates filled the air as servers prepared the table set ups. The shiny sheen of silver was seen all around the tables as the cutlery had all been polished to perfection. The tables at the side were filled with food arranged in intricate designs.

“Ah Pa, is the food ready?” Junsu’s voice cracked through the surreal air.

“Yes I just checked and it is almost done.” Junsu’s father had kindly asked his friend to cater for the occasion and what a feast it was. There was a huge array of starters, exotic fusion courses and desserts.

“Is there anything you want my help with?” Boa walked over to Junsu who shook his head and smiled.

“Are they ready?” He put his arm around Boa as they strolled away from the food table. Boa blushed slightly. Junsu didn’t know how his casual action was causing butterflies in her stomach. He had been friendly since the time they left the concert together but recently he seemed a little warmer.

“Yes. She looks beautiful.” Boa answered softly.

Guests were starting to stream into the garden and filling up the tables. This was meant to be a cosy party so only close friends were invited. Dancers from Black Rap and the agency soon appeared. They were no longer dressed in their usual streetwear. Instead, the men had suits on and the ladies were dressed in elegant dresses.

“Wow, Kang Min! You look good for once!” Yunho exclaimed as he walked into the garden and put his arm around Jong Min.

“Stop laughing at me! If it weren’t for my good friends, you will never see me in a suit.” He scowled as he tried to adjust to his suit. Yunho laughed. Yunho was looking impeccably handsome in a sharp black suit. The ladies wasted no time in whispering amongst themselves in discussing the presence of this gorgeous man.

“Are they here yet?” Yunho asked Junsu as he spotted Boa and Junsu walking over.

“They said they are rushing over but you know how it is when Jae Joong tries to go anywhere.” The whole group sighed as they realized the couple might be late.

“They are still not here yet!” Yoo Chun strided into the garden towards them with an anxious look on his face. “Even Ji Hye’s parents are here already!”

“Are your parents here?” Kang Min asked.

“Yes. They have been helping out here and there but they hardly talk to each other.” Yoo Chun shrugged.

“WE ARE SO SORRY!!” Ji Hye and Jae Joong ran into the garden hand in hand.

“You guys are FINALLY here. I was so worried you two will be late!” Yoo Chun frowned.

“I am sorry! There were so many fans who were trying to get his autograph!” Ji Hye caught her breath and smiled at Yoo Chun. “Oppa, you look so good.”

Yoo Chun smiled sheepishly as he looked down happily. Yoo Chun was wearing a white suit that was fitted to his tall frame perfectly. He had a silk bow tie around his neck and it was one of those rare occasions Yoo Chun was dressed so smartly.

“I am so happy for you oppa!” Ji Hye hugged Yoo Chun tightly. He returned her hug with one of his famous boyish smiles.

“Your parents are here. They are over there.” Yoo Chun pointed to a table.

“Your parents are here?” Jae Joong’s face was filled with shock.

“Yes of course! Yoo Chun is a close family friend. Of course they would be here.” Ji Hye smiled mischievously. Jae Joong immediately gulped and started to adjust his clothes. Ji Hye laughed as she led him to her parents. It was a refreshing change to see superstar Hero bowing and stammering towards two people who would decide on his fate with Ji Hye. Everyone started to walk to their seats and sat down

“Good day everyone! We have gathered today to witness an important day for our dear friends, Yoo Chun and Jeong Hee.” Yunho smiled as he announced and looked around the guests.

Yoo Chun was standing at the gazebo where the pastor had been waiting. Changmin was standing next to him giggling at Yoo Chun’s nervousness. He could not stop smiling to himself as he fidgeted with his fingers. It was the first time for many to see such a shy side of Yoo Chun who was acting like a shy teenage boy.

“Please rise and put your hands together for the bride.” Yunho announced.

As our eyes turned to the entrance of the garden, we found ourselves staring at Jeong Hee who looked breathtakingly beautiful in a beautiful off shoulder white gown. Even under her veil, her skin glowed with happiness. Na Ra and Yong Mi were smiling widely behind her. When she heard the music, she looked surprised as though it was something she had not heard before.

PLAY OST: MIDUHYO

We didn’t know Yunho had quietly slipped the microphone to Yoo Chun’s hands. Yoo Chun’s voice filled the air as Junsu and Jae Joong joined Yoo Chun together with Yunho and Changmin.

Girl,

Let me prove that my love is real

I’ll give all my love to you,

Please trust me

Jeong Hee covered her mouth with her hands as she laughed and shook her head at the surprise her husband-to-be had prepared for her. She smiled girlishly as she regained her footsteps and started walking towards him.

I believe…

I believe that one can fall in love at first sight,

Though I told you that it wasn’t possible.

I only hid this thought from you

Because I was afraid that you would look at me

As if I was careless and hasty.

Her every step was filled with certainty and her face was filled with blissful joy. Yoo Chun’s face was glowing with pride and happiness as he belted out the song wholeheartedly.

To tell the truth,

Ever since I met you I only lived with thoughts of you.

There was only one thing on my mind

From when I woke up in the morning to when I went to bed at night.

The men were giving Yoo Chun the thumbs up while the ladies were wiping tears from their eyes from hearing the love and sincerity in Yoo Chun’s voice.

I believe in you…

I will send all my feelings for you through the the way I look at you.

Do you know how my heart feels,

How I want to keep the feelings I have for you hidden?

Even the fearful feelings for when you might leave me one day.

You…

The guys were singing with all their hearts in support of Yoo Chun’s love.

Love is a nervous feeling that flutters your heart…

It is like a breathtaking loneliness…

Please keep looking at me with the same eyes…

Always and forever like this.

Ji Hye looked at Boa who nodded at her as they were both moved by Yoo Chun’s song. Yoo Chun’s parents were watching him with joy in their eyes.

If only you could stay close enough to me

So that my heart can relax…

Just so that I could see you…

I would be very happy

You…

Jeong Hee breathed deeply as every step took her closer to the love of her life and the new chapter that will begin after today.

I believe in you…

I will send all my feelings for you through the the way I look at you.

Do you know how my heart feels,

How I want to keep the feelings I have for you hidden?

Even the fearful feelings for when you might leave me one day.

Na Ra was smiling at Changmin as she approached the stage behind Jeong Hee. Changmin broke into a boyish smile while he tried to keep with the song.

If I could stay by your side like this…

If, in the end, it is that I don’t know anything about how much I love you.

Jeong Hee was finally standing in front of Yoo Chun who was holding his hand out for her.

I can’t let you go

You are the only one in my life

He led her to the pastor as he finished the last words of his song. The whole crowd was clapping loudly as the couple stepped up in front of the pastor. As the pastor waved his hand, the crowd sat down quietly.

“Dear ladies and gentlemen, we have gathered here today to witness the union of two very special souls.” He smiled kindly at the couple.

“Mr Park Yoo Chun, do you take Miss Kim Jeong Hee to be your lawful wedded wife?”

“I do.” Yoo Chun answered firmly.

“Do you promise to love and cherish her, in sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, for better for worse, and forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto her, for so long as you both shall live?”

“I do.” He answered again with certainty.

“Miss Kim Jeong Hee, do you take Mr Park Yoo Chun  to be your lawful wedded husband?”

“I…” As Jeong Hee was about to answer, Yoo Chun suddenly dropped on one knees in front of her.

“Yoo Chun…what are you doing?” Jeong Hee was startled by his sudden gesture.

“This is the proposal you deserved to have. Will you be my wife?” He looked her into her eyes deeply. All the ladies went “Awwwwww….”

Jeong Hee sniffed and answered in a shaking voice “I do.”

“Do you promise to love and cherish him, in sickness and in health, for richer for poorer, for better for worse, and forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto him, for so long as you both shall live?”

Jeong had kept her eyes on Yoo Chun all this while. “I do.”

“Do you together promise in the presence of your friends and family that you will at all times and in all circumstances, conduct yourselves toward one another as becomes Husband and Wife?”

They both turned to the pastor as Yoo Chun got up. “We do.”

“Do you together promise you will love, cherish and respect one another throughout the years?”

“We do.”

“If there is any objection to this marriage, raise your voice now or forever rest your case.”

The pastor waited for a while as silence filled the air.

“If there is no objection, I hereby pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride” The crowd stood and gave a thunderous applause as Yoo Chun kissed his new wife.

In the midst of the clapping and cheering, I noticed Changmin and Na Ra were also kissing sweetly in the background. It was a matter of time the couple would be saying their own marriage vows. Boa and Junsu stole glances at each other.

I saw Jae Joong walking over to Ji Hye who was standing next to me. He smiled lovingly at her and took her hand.

“Someday.” He smiled as he squeezed her hand. “I promise.” He kissed her gently.

Ji Hye nodded as she squeezed his hand in return and they turned to face the couple again who was now covered in confetti and flowers from well-wishers.

I smiled to myself in satisfaction.

“Someday” came about four years later.

 ———————————————–

Author’s Notes:

And this marks the end of Colored Rhythms…a little sad but I have new stories coming up and I promise they will be quite different!

Thanks for reading if you have made it this far

Translation credits: seohee @ sbsk.net & BM

We all turned to look at the owner of that loud voice.

“KANG HO DONG??” Our jaws dropped in the same instant.

“Why? Is it such a surprise to see me? This is the episode where we talk about all the juicy relationships! Of course you will need someone like me!” He slapped his chest loudly.

“Aren’t you supposed to be filming Ya Shim Man Man?” Jae Joong eyed him suspiciously.

“We have no filming this week so that’s why I can be here!” He replied cheerfully.

“I am getting out of here.” Jae Joong stood up from his seat. Kang Ho Dong was not a famous host for no reason. He had a reputation for making people say things they never thought they would.

“Ah Jae Joong, sit down. We are looking forward to your truthful confessions!” Kang Ho Dong grinned widely.

“Yes Jae Joong! Be a man! Men should not be fearful of SMALL things like this!” Yoo Chun boasted as he sat back leisurely.

“Yes indeed! Speaking of which, I heard Yoo Chun is very good at handling girls?” Kang Ho Dong slipped in casually.

“Oh course! Why do you think…” Yoo Chun suddenly covered his mouth as he caught Jeong Hee staring at him.

“Yoo Chun! BE A MAN! Men should not be fearful of SMALL THINGS LIKE THAT!” Jae Joong smirked.

I sat there and laughed to myself as I watched Kang Ho Dong unleash his powers on them. I decided to step in to rescue them.

“Maybe let’s start with the relationship between Yoo Chun and Ji Hye.” I smiled.

“YES! LET’S TALK ABOUT THAT!” Yoo Chun jumped up in agreement…a little too excitedly.

“The relationship between Yoo Chun and Ji Hye is one that is very similar to that of close siblings even though they were just friends with no blood relations. Yoo Chun was Ji Hye’s first inspiration in dance and is still very much a motivating and guiding force to her. Like Boa, Yoo Chun helped keep Ji Hye on track when she got distracted by her love troubles. While Yoo chun gave her inspiration for pursuing her dreams, Ji Hye was the one who got Yoo Chun into dancing. She never quite knew that partly the reason why he loved her so much was that he knew if Ji Hye had not introduced him to dance, he would have gone astray.”

“Ah Yoo Chun, that was very manly of you.” Kang Ho Dong nodded.

“Yoo Chun and Ji Hye had a relationship of mutual dependence and guidance. He makes fun of her in good times and feels sad for her when she’s down. The difference is he shows his love through actions rather than words. For example, when Ji Hye broke up with Yunho, he didn’t go into her room to comfort her because that was not something he knew how to do but next day, he had already arranged for her to be out of the concert team so that she wouldn’t need to face him. Same goes for the time he arranged for an apartment after Jae Joong’s scandal broke out. If you read back, you will see the little instances he cares for her everywhere in the story.”

I took a sip of water and continued.

“On Ji Hye’s end, she knew Yoo Chun’s weaknesses more than anyone else. She knew of his past and what hurt him thus it made her sensitive to Yoo Chun’s changes as well especially during the time Yoo Chun fell into depression from Jeong Hee’s departure. One of my favorite scenes in the story was that of Ji Hye crawling into bed after she found Yoo Chun crying in his sleep. That was one scene where you saw the vulnerable side of Yoo Chun and the tenderness of their relationship. Thus, they had a relationship which was really special they were not only friends, but also family and inspiration to each other.”

“Wow would you two like to say something to each other?” Kang Ho Dong asked softly. Ji Hye wrapped her arms around Yoo Chun and smiled gently as she said “I love you oppa.” Yoo Chun’s face softened as he heard her words and squeezed her with love.

“Ah Yoo Chun I didn’t know you were such a good brother! So Jeong Hee, is he a good boyfriend?” Kang Ho Dong immediately turned to Jeong Hee. She was startled by his sudden question.

“I…I” Jeong Hee stuttered. Yoo Chun immediately put his arm around her shoulder protectively.

“Wahhhh protective boyfriend comes to the rescue.” Kang Ho Dong chuckled.

“Yoo Chun is not too bad as a boyfriend.” I giggled.

“Yoo Chun and Jeong Hee’s relationship is one that looks like opposites attract from the outside. She was your girl next door while he was the party animal. When you look deeper into their relationship, Yoo Chun liked her because she had something he craved for innately. After having grown up with a broken family and being accustomed to a life of casual relationships and hypocrisy, Jeong Hee’s innocence and simplicity struck Yoo Chun somewhere deep in his heart that he had hid from himself. She was someone whom you could feel her soul in her eyes. This was different from the eyes of deceit, lust and complexity that Yoo Chun was used to. This was why he grew to like her.”

Jeong Hee blushed and look down as she shifted shyly in her seat. Yoo Chun squeezed her shoulder gently as he placed his head against hers.

“However, such feelings were foreign to Yoo Chun. Thus, he was thrown into disarray. This led him to try to find stability through the only familiar environment he knew and that was the club. This is how he comes to meet her best friend by a twist of fate. I believe I mentioned this before, that this part about two best friends liking the same man was based on a real story. Yoo Chun didn’t really like Yong Mi or meant to lead her on. She was simply there when he found himself grappling with the confusion that the club was no longer as familiar to him anymore. Jeong Hee left because she didn’t want to hurt Yong Mi and more importantly, because she knew she couldn’t accept Yoo Chun’s lack of courage and clarity towards her. This broke Yoo Chun because he knew he had screwed up the only love he ever felt for a woman. This brought him back to his party lifestyle before even more…”

“Yes I heard he had quite a few women…” Kang Ho Dong turned to Yoo Chun slowly.

“I was hurt! I didn’t know what I was doing! There isn’t any more okay?” Yoo Chun turned to Jeong Hee and held her shoulders as he looked into her eyes desperately.

“You still have girls coming to the studio…” Na Ra joined in the teasing.

“I didn’t do anything! I just talk to them because they are students!” Yoo Chun shot Na Ra a quick stare.

“Yoo Chun ah…you will always be a flirt. It’s part of you…” Jeong Hee spoke softly.

“Oh no, you are not going to walk out on me now are you?” Yoo Chun’s face turned pale. Jeong Hee was expressionless. I could see the desperation in Yoo Chun’s eyes rising with every passing second.

“Do you know where your heart belongs?” Jeong Hee asked softly. Yoo Chun nodded furiously.

“Then I accept you for who you are.” She finally broke into a warm smile as she rubbed Yoo Chun’s cheek gently. Yoo Chun heaved a loud sigh of relief.

“Now you know why I wanted to leave the studio just now.” Jae Joong remarked sarcastically. Yoo Chun looked at Jae Joong with agreement.

“Ah how can you say that?” Kang Ho Dong pretended to look hurt.

“ERM, lets talk about Changmin and Na Ra! They look a little neglected.” I offered, in the hope of changing the mood in the studio.

“Oh you FINALLY remember us!” Na Ra rolled her eyes. I chuckled.

“Changmin and Na Ra had the most straightforward relationship in the story compared to the others. This was necessary as it gave the story a sense of balance that not all relationships had to be complicated. Na Ra had never seen Changmin in a romantic way before. She was partly held back by the fact that he was younger than her. Na Ra had expected herself to date someone older and more charming like Yunho. Changmin saw a real side of Na Ra that many didn’t. Despite the circumstances he found her in, he did not feel ashamed of her but gave her support instead. This was what made Na Ra change her mind because he had shown much love and maturity in his actions.”

Changmin smiled boyishly as he held Na Ra’s hand. She was smiling sweetly.

“Changmin and Na Ra are also necessary for providing the light moments in the story. Though they may look like opposites because one was so talkative and bubbly and the other was so quiet, they actually had similarities inside. They were both happy-go-lucky people with a simple attitude towards life. Na Ra’s presence on Changmin’s life also opened him up to being more outgoing and bubbly as a person. You can see towards the later half of the story, Changmin becomes a bit more talkative. Though they bicker, it is because they have settled to a stable relationship almost like husband and wife. And of course, they both love food!” I laughed.

“Yes you should see how both of them eat ever since they got together. I am starting to get worried I will have two pigs on my team soon.” Yoo Chun blurted.

“It’s good to eat! Just like me!” Kang Ho Dong beamed with happiness. Changmin and Na Ra looked at him and then each other. “Let’s eat less, chagiya.” Changmin mumbled. Na Ra nodded naughtily. Kang Ho Dong dropped his head in disappointment.

“Now, it’s time for some true story anecdotes. The part about Ji Hye and Junsu staying together? It was based on my own experience. I did share an apartment with a guy friend of mine for a certain period. Unfortunately, he’s not a dreamboat like Junsu.” I laughed.

“The concert given by Jae Joong was done using real concert audio from Dong Bang Shin Ki concert. The mood really gets you going! I have some other true story anecdotes but they will be discussed within the next episode which brings me to the next point.” I bit my lower lip in guilt.

“I had promised to discuss about Boa and Junsu in this chapter because I had planned for this chapter to be the last so I could wrap up the whole story in fifty chapters in all. Unfortunately, it would make this chapter too long so I have to extend it to another chapter. This means I will only get to them in the next episode. I am so sorry.” I looked down in guilt.

“I promise the next episode will be long and it will be very special! It will be the last special!” I spoke to the camera enthusiastically, in the hope the readers will forgive me.

“Joodii, don’t give up! I am sure you will find a way if your heart really wants to do it.” I smiled widely into the camera. “I am happy to have Kang Ho Dong on our program today. He will be joining us for the next episode where we will discuss all the relationships you guys have been waiting for!”

“Can I not come for the next episode?” Jae Joong said flatly.

“Then give Ji Hye up.” I retorted. He immediately hugged her tightly and stuck his tongue out at me.

“WELL THEN, now that the troublesome dog has been settled, see you guys next time!” I smiled sweetly.

“She called me a dog AGAIN!!” Jae Joong was waving his arms in delirium as the camera went off.

“AHHHH JAE JOONG!! I HAVEN’T TOUCHED UP MY MAKE-UP AFTER EATING!!! STOP FILMING!!! ” I ran away from the camera Jae Joong was pushing in my face. He ran after me and chased me around the changing room.

“You better talk about me today or else I will post this on Youtube!!” He screamed as I ran into the corridor.

“I will KIILLLLLLL you if you do!” I scowled.

“I should have…”

*pant pant*

“…given…”

*pant pant*

“…Ji Hye to Junsu!” I cursed under my breath.

“Yes you made me suffer throughout the entire story!” Junsu suddenly appeared behind me.

“Aish!! I will tell you more later!! Now hold this!” I gave him my personal camera as I powdered my face. He rolled his eyes and muttered “Women! So vain!”

“Yaaa!! Who’s the one who doesn’t eat at night because he is on a DIET?!”

“I am just…”

“DIET! DIET! Junsu is soooo vvvaaaaaiiinnnn!!” I sang to myself happily.

“Aish I can’t win the author. Quick, say what you need to say.” He waved the camera in front of me.

“Oh dear readers!” I quickly turned to the camera and smiled.

“I see some of you are curious about my name and nationality. I have sent you private messages with the answers. Many of you are curious about Junsu and Boa…” I grinned at Junsu. He suddenly turned a bright shade of pink. I laughed out loudly. “I will address the relationships very soon. So stay tuned!”

“Oh I do need to eat too of course and I love kimchi chigae! Junsu, make me more of that! Oh can you make my_xuelin some pancakes? She has worked so hard on the posters! She deserves it. Did you see how good she made you look? Or everyone else for that matter??” Junsu nodded furiously.

“Yes madam, I will make some and get someone to send to her!”

“So will you talk about me today?” Junsu asked

“Yes, I actually saved your segment till today because I wanted to give you more attention!” He smiled happily.

“Oh Joodii, 15 is a great time! I really regret I didn’t go all out when I was 15. A lot of trainees are that age too isn’t it? So no, 15 is not too late! Just remember to study! Ryohei_xp, thank you for recommending the story to your friends! To the new readers like cassra, welcome!!”

“Yaa AJUMMA! Faster! We are going to start filming soon!” Jae Joong shouted loudly from the hallway.

“Aish!! That little…Junsu, I REALLY should have made Ji Hye dump him!” I turned to Junsu and grumbled.

He laughed as he pulled my arm and dragged me to the studio with me cursing under my breath.

——————————————————-

“Welcome to Colored Rhythms Special Part 3!” I smiled happily into the camera. I was asked to open the show today.

“Today, we will be talking about the much awaited characters, Jae Joong and Junsu as well as some of the relationships in this story…”

“Finally!” Jae Joong said loudly. I shot him a death-ray glare.

“Since you are so anxious, we will talk about you first. Honestly, Jae Joong was a character that I had no idea how to develop. I mean after the sexy Yunho, devoted Junsu, how do you create a character that people will feel he’s worth loving? All I knew he was supposed to be a singer and that I wanted to make a shot at creating a story based on what might be happening behind the scenes for singers in real life.”

“You didn’t know what to do with me???” Jae Joong gasped.

“But you didn’t turn out too bad did you? The puppy meeting between Ji Hye and Jae Joong was an accidental idea. I wanted Jae Joong to be sexy and yet boyish at the same time. I took a lot of reference from a certain very well known Korean male performer with regards to Jae Joong’s character. I also took reference from the real Jae Joong himself. Based on interviews about Jae Joong, I observed that while he had a cool image, he was often described as talkative, warm and caring in real life. We all know the real Jae Joong is a mean cook so these came from him. This formed the base of Jae Joong’s character.”

I took a seat and continued.

“Through Jae Joong, I wanted to explore the life of singers we might not know. I wanted to explore the difference between their reel life and real life thus the disparity in character between his stage persona and real person. It is not hard to find reports of the amount of hard work and fatigue singers experience so this is something you see from him as well.”

“Oh yes, it’s hard work.” Jae Joong nodded along with the others.

“Like Ji Hye, Jae Joong is a person with big dreams and ambitions. He’s a year younger than Ji Hye and you can see traces of his youth and boyish nature. Whilst he’s mature about his work, he still showed moments where he gets reckless and angry easily such as the times when he saw Ji Hye with Yunho, Yunho’s reappearance and so on. This is his slightly immature side showing where he acts on impulse raw emotions. Towards the end, he becomes calmer. Thus, he was growing up fast because of his work yet he was grappling with the youth he had forgone for his dreams. This was something I observed from the real DBSK and the certain famous Korean performer. While they looked and acted mature, it was not hard to see they were still essentially young when they were not in official interviews.”

“Geez, you make me sound like a hormone-crazy young boy.” Jae Joong pouted.

“Ah stop pouting at me. It works on Ji Hye but not me. Besides, you ARE a hormone-crazy young boy. Do I really have to remind you of your forced kissing on Ji Hye when you saw Yunho or perhaps what happened in chapter 30?” I smirked widely and Ji Hye giggled at hearing my comment. Jae Joong turned a bright shade of pink as everyone tried to contain their laughter.

“Bro, you should admit it. She’s the author, you can’t win her.” Yoo Chun patted Jae Joong’s shoulder.

“Yes he should…and be just like YOU?” Jeong Hee arched a brow and stared at Yoo Chun.

“Oops.” Yoo Chun stuck out his tongue when he suddenly realized the situation he had placed himself in.

I laughed and continued “I had not planned for Jae Joong to be this sweet to Ji Hye but somehow his character grew by itself and I was quite surprised at the eventual result as well. Some of you have asked if Jae Joong’s character was real. Well I have mentioned some of his character references above. His romantic side…well some of it is real. The morning and night messages were based on my personal experience. The night visits are a mix of real life experience and imagination because of the nature of his work. The walk by the river was a wish expressed by the real Jae Joong when asked what kind of date he would like. His gentle and sweet displays of love are also a sign of his innocence. He does these for her simply because he loves her.”

I caught Jae Joong looking at Ji Hye dreamily and smiled to myelf.

“Some of you might wonder why I brought in the Hye Rin incident. This was based on the scandal of that certain famous Korean performer and a famous Korean actress. One must remember that Jae Joong was still new in the business and thus, he was still learning how to separate his work from his real life. On top of that, he’s still fundamentally young and thus, be susceptible to weakness. Lastly, he’s still a man which means it was not impossible for him to feel tempted by an attractive woman especially after such close interactions during filming. In an ideal world, he would never be tempted by her but the truth is, it was very possible to me. Just look at the many couples that ended up together after their onscreen romance. This was the reality I wanted to paint.”

“But I chose you in the end…” Jae Joong held Ji Hye’s hand tightly.

“Yes you barged into her house and practically MADE her accept you…” I muttered sarcastically.

“Stop digging on that!!” Jae Joong fumed in embarrassment. I stuck my tongue out at him in defiance.

“Oh well but you did grow up eventually. I will touch on that in the next episode…now for the character I had been waiting to talk about…Junsu.”

I looked at Junsu sadly and sighed. “Before I talk about you, I must do this.”

I walked over and hugged Junsu tightly. “I think many readers want to hug you so I am hugging you on their behalf. I do want to hug you too because I put you through so much heartache.” I sat down beside him.

“Junsu is a very special character to me. He is a character I hold close to my heart even though he didn’t get the girl in the end. Junsu was based on my impression of the van guy I mentioned in the last chapter. He’s also based on the real Junsu’s bubbly nature. He’s like sunshine that makes you feel warm.” I smiled warmly at Junsu.

“Like Yunho, Junsu has dreams of exploring and traveling the world. The difference is that Junsu’s emotional make-up is more grounded than Yunho. He’s a more organized person as you can see from Ji Hye’s observations at the end of the story after she stayed with him for a while. He’s neat, organized and hardworking. Thus, in a way, you can call Junsu a free spirit in terms of his dreams but he was different from Yunho because he was more grounded.”

I sighed as I got to the next part. “I am sure almost every girl will know a guy like this at least once in their life.”

“A guy whom you feel is a really nice guy and would love your friends to meet. The guy you would introduce to your friends as a potential boyfriend candidate and hope for them to work out. The guy that you wish would always experience good things and be happy because he is such a good guy.” I paused for a while as I took in a deep breath.

“Yet, if he should ever fall in love with you, your reply would be ‘Sorry, I like you but not in that way’ or perhaps ‘I only like you as a friend’. You would always support their love as long as it wasn’t you. Or perhaps a guy that you know you take for granted because he is so good to you? Familiar? Yes Junsu is that guy. This is why Junsu doesn’t get the girl in the end.”

I looked at Junsu with guilt and squeezed his hand gently.

“I can’t tell you how many times I nearly wanted to change the ending and let Ji Hye be with him because he is really so sweet and devoted. I had to steel myself to follow through with the ending. As much as there are guys who win the girls over but truth is, most girls never quite get round to accepting them as lovers once they fall into the buddies category in the girls’ minds. I had experiences like that and it seems some of the readers had similar experiences as well. If you ask me if there are guys like Junsu…well I do know a guy who pursued a girl for six years. Just look back into your life or that of your friends. I am sure you will find a guy like Junsu somewhere.”‘

Junsu shook his head “Poor me…”

“The challenge of Junsu’s character was to make him lovable enough so that people will feel for him even though he’s not always in the story. It was difficult to create an existence that people don’t really see and yet always remember. He’s always there and yet not really there.”

“Oh yes, I faded into the background for a large part of the story…” He mumbled.

“Junsu is the character I wanted readers to really experience as though you were in Ji Hye’s shoes. You don’t see him yet you know he’s always there for you. You don’t hear about him yet you always worry about him. You always hope he will get the girl and be happy. Yet, I am quite sure if you were really in Ji Hye’s shoes, you may also deny knowing about his feelings and eventually him as well. This was the reality I hoped you guys would not only see but also feel as well. As I read your comments along the story, I could see some of you getting into this role that I had planned. I wonder if you noticed it too?” I smiled curiously at the camera.

“Junsu also gave me the inspiration for one of my favorite OST scenes. The real Junsu sang Sa Rang Ham Ni Da with such emotion that I had to look up what the words meant. To my surprise, it fitted perfectly with Junsu’s role. Even though I grew to have more OST scenes that I liked, that scene in chapter 37 remains very special to me till today because it was such a product of inspiration. It was written so early in the story and I had waited so long to post it. If this was ever made into a drama, I would want to direct that scene personally. If you truly understood the pain of Junsu’s character, you will know why that scene was so heart-wrenching.”

I felt my heart wring when I remembered that scene.

“I am sorry Junsu. Just like you waited, I waited a long time to post that chapter for you and I waited a long time to talk about you. This is why I kept you as the last person to be talked about because your character was very special to me.”

“Do you want to date him instead?” Jae Joong suddenly blurted.

“Shut up doggie! You are endangering my life.” I glared at him. I turned to smile at Junsu again before I went back to my seat.

“She called me doggie! What is it about her and dogs??” Jae Joong scowled.

“I will also talk about some of the relationships in the story today. I shall start with the friendship amongst the girls.”

“Ah finally we come back to the girls again!” Na Ra complained loudly.

“The friendship between Boa, Na Ra and Ji Hye is very different. Na Ra was clearly warm towards Ji Hye and Ji Hye was her source of girly friendship in Black Rap. They are a source of joy and support for each other. She is like the outsider who sees the things that Ji Hye doesn’t see such as the times when Ji Hye was with Yunho and of course, Junsu’s love.”

I turned to Boa.

“Boa and Ji Hye had a friendship that started out as mutual respect and envy. They probably didn’t know that both of them respected each other and were envious of each other’s talent. Ji Hye was envious of Boa’s skills while Boa was secretly envious of Ji Hye’s potential. Thus Boa would be one of the people who tries to keep Ji Hye on track because she likes good competition. They developed their friendship as they started to know each other and Ji Hye selflessly called Boa into the agency. Boa’s suspected relationship with Jae Joong left an even greater impact on Ji Hye because of the underlying sense of envy. I had not planned for Boa to always be the one there for the guys when Ji Hye leaves but somehow it turned out that way!” Boa laughed.

“Changmin’s friendship with Yoo Chun is pretty straightforward. As for Yunho and Yoo Chun, let’s just say that it is similar to a situation of birds of a feather flock together. Remember the club scene where Yoo Chun said he would like to be nasty to Yunho but he cannot because they are the same? I was referring to the similarity between the two of them in terms of their inability to commit. Yoo Chun and Yunho hate each other’s guts in a very subtle manner and yet they have a sense of respect for each other as well. This is more apparent at the end when Yunho helped bring Ji Hye back to Seoul.”

I looked at Yunho and Yoo Chun and thought for a moment.

“Yunho and Yoo Chun share many parallels. They are both very talented, hardworking and a mess when it comes to their personal relationships. Yet, I must bring to your attention that while both had a chance at love, Yoo Chun was the one who could bring himself to face it. I have observed some male friends who are what people would term as players. You would be surprised to know that some of them do settle down once they feel they had enough or found the right person. Yoo Chun was an example of this while Yunho is an example of those who never quite do so.”

“I am not a player! I just have a lot of love that I can share with many people!” Yoo Chun protested.

“I can’t help it that girls and even BOYS fall over at my feet! What am I supposed to do when there are so many of them??” Yunho joined in Yoo Chun’s protest.

“Players. The kind of excuses they give…” I rolled my eyes.

“Well we are almost at the end of the third special. It has been a long and more serious segment today. It’s time to share some of the true story anecdotes.”

“You might remember that Boa came from a wealthy family and thus she faced objections in being a dancer? This was based on a real person. It also goes to show the lack of support that some performers get from their loved ones with regards to their passions.”

“You may also remember Jae Joong’s incident where it was reported that his parents are not his real parents. This was also based on the real Jae Joong’s story where his real father came out into public wanting to acknowledge him. It was quite a scandal then and Jae Joong was quite upset about it. Jae Joong passing out was also based on the real Jae Joong who passed out from exhaustion.”

“Remember Jeong Hee’s good friend liking Yoo Chun?” Jeong Hee smiled gently.

“That was based on a friend’s real life story as well. Two best friends liking the same guy. This is honestly a very tough situation to handle. The real life story was a lot more difficult than Jeong Hee’s story though. It did not turn out as smoothly.” I sighed.

“The next one will be a little scandalous…” I glanced at Yoo Chun.

“Someone asked if it is possible to kiss a girl and run your hands down another’s thigh like Yoo Chun did. Well it is possible. Yoo Chun’s decadent lifestyle after Jeong Hee left where he got into multiple sexual relations was based on real life accounts as well. That’s teatime gossip for you!” I giggled. Everyone started whispering amongst themselves.

“Now for the famous token of love between Jae Joong and Ji Hye…it is common for Koreans to have couple rings. The real Jae Joong wears a ring on his fourth finger as well though I don’t know if he still does. Anyway, I am sure we all had a ring or some object of love at some point. I had a ring before…” I blushed and looked down.

“Oh someone actually knows how to be shy besides throwing pillows at me, screaming at me in the hallway and fighting for food!” Jae Joong smirked.

I turned to the camera and got into a monotone voice.

“Dear audience, I will address your questions about Junsu and Boa in the next episode. Please feel free to send in your questions. Now, I have to go kill Jae Joong so please excuse us. SEE YOU NEXT TIME!” I raised my voice at the last few words as I charged towards Jae Joong.

“I am going to kiiiilllllllllllllll you!!!! How can you say these things on television….aiissshh….!!! “

———————————————

Author’s Notes:

For those who don’t know, ajumma refers to auntie in a not-so-positive way

“Hmm about five minutes.” He took a quick look at his watch.

“Okay, I wanna do a special recording just for the readers. I will make it quick.”

“Okay ready go!” He turned on the camera.

I smiled awkwardly at the camera that just went alive and started talking.

“Dear readers, I was initially concerned if you will like the format I am doing the specials or find it interesting. I am happy to see you guys enjoy it so far. Joodii, I thought of Dana too but I thought Na Ra’s face was cute in the pictures hahaha! Tjh246, congratulations on getting distinction! Way to go! I am so envious! Ana_ari_007, please tell Vanessa that her comment has touched me deeply. I actually felt a little teary reading it.” I put my hand to my chest and smiled.

“I have actually considered doing a special on the comments that touched my heart but I realized I will end up publishing all the whole fic so I better not. I can’t tell you how much all your comments have kept me going. I am now taking writing more seriously and who knows, your love may just open a new path in life for me? I would like to hug all of you but I can’t so this is the best I can do here.” I opened my arms widely for the camera.

“Okay, we have to get ready to roll anytime now.” The director warned.

“Okay thank you everyone!” I blew a kiss to the camera and ran to my seat.

“Lights, camera, 3, 2, 1,CUE!” The director shouted firmly.

“Welcome back to Colored Rhythms Special Part 2!” Changmin opened the show happily.

“Yes welcome back! Today we will talk about…” Na Ra chirped.

“THE GUYS!” All the men in the room shouted in amazing unison much to Na Ra’s resentment.

“Chagiya…the guys deserve their chance already. See, Junsu hyung even brought your favorite pancake!” Changmin brought a big plate of seafood pancake to Na Ra’s face.

Na Ra immediately turned to the camera and smiled sweetly. “Yes we will talk about the guys today. Junsu has been so kind to prepare a lot of food for us today so we can eat while we carry out today’s show!” Everyone cheered loudly.

“KIMCHI CHIGAE!!” I dived for a big bowl of my favorite stew. I found Ji Hye’s hands on it as well.

I bared my teeth and gritted. “Ji Hye. I have already given you so many bowls of Junsu’s stews and good food. It’s my turn now!” No one was going to come between Junsu’s chigae and me.

She pouted and released her grip on it. I ran back to my seat in triumphant glee. Jae Joong laughed and soothed her by offering her a plate of noodles.

“Now that we are all ready, let’s address some of the questions from the readers before we move on to today’s topic. Yippie-shi…” Na Ra said loudly as she helped herself to a huge piece of pancake.

*slurp*

“Yes?”

*slurp*

“Woo…so yummy…” I was quite ready to just sit down and forget about the show with my chigae. Just the chigae and me was enough.

“YIPPIE-SHI!!!!” Changmin coughed.

“Ah yes!!…what are the questions?” I stuck my tongue out at him.

“So you are a dancer?” Na Ra asked.

I nodded and answered “I do perform and teach. I did jazz, hip hop and salsa. I mainly teach salsa now. I perform less nowadays.”

“Speaking of dance, everyone is SOOO curious about the HOT DANCE with yunho!” Na Ra shrieked.

I nearly choked on my chigae.

“Now, before Cassiopeia comes after me, it was not with the real Yunho. I wished it was the real Yunho!”

“Hey we can dance now you know!” Yunho grinned.

“Are you trying to kill me? Fangirls will probably mob me to death.” I shot him a killer look with my sweetest fake smile.

“It was with the person who formed one of the main influences for Yunho’s character. The dance, was well, pretty much like how you saw in the scene. Some people have seen a video of us dancing but I won’t be loading it up. Sorry about that! He’s someone I really look up to…oh by the way, he is Korean too.” I laughed out loud.

Everyone went “OOHHHHHH….”

“Is he better than me?” Yunho stood proudly with his chest forward.

“Stop showing off your manboobs! I wouldn’t know until I dance with you and I don’t want to die from dancing with you.”

“I DON’T HAVE MANBOOBS! I LOST WEIGHT!!” Yunho protested violently.

I shrugged and took another sip of chigae, much to his frustration.

“Here’s a letter from claireang who would like to know if yoochun was based on a real life person or the real yoochun himself. She also asked what Ji Hye was doing before she came to korea to and what happened to Hee Chul.”

“See, I knew girls will be curious about me.” Yoo Chun smirked. Yunho choked on his rice when he heard Hee Chul’s name. He looked around to see if Hee Chul was around.

“We’ll talk about Yoo Chun in today’s segment so I will leave this for later. Ji Hye just finished school and was just starting on a normal office job before she left for Korea. Someone asked about her age long ago. She is 21, pretty old for a dancer starting out. Well, Hee Chul…”

Just then, Hee Chul stomped in.

“I’M HERE!” He glared at Yunho before he sat down beside me.

“Well Hee Chul, why don’t you tell everyone how you’ve been?” I offered him some chigae in the hope he will calm down.

“After I confronted HIM, he suddenly turned around one day and said I wasn’t for him. I spent so much effort on trying to win his heart and this is what he gives me! I finished Hyori’s concert and swore not to do another project with him inside ever again!” He pouted as he snatched my spoon and helped himself to a spoonful of chigae.

“Yaaa!! Jung Yunho!! Explain yourself!!” Hee Chul screamed while waving my spoon in the air. The crew soon came in and pulled him out of the studio. I grabbed my spoon from his frantic arms as they dragged him out.

“Phew!” Yunho let out of sigh of relief.

“See what your careless affections bring you.” Ji Hye remarked sarcastically.

“YAA!!” Yunho retorted.

“NEXT QUESTION!” Changmin interrupted.

“Mangoberrie said you were like the mysterious writer. Alice_Aiensyah asked if you can reveal your name and sHaziEe asked if you were in the story as Ji Hye.”

“Well all I can say is my name has nine alphabets and starts with an animal. I didn’t really plan for Ji Hye to be like me though she does bear my dreams. Slowly as I wrote, I guess more of myself went into her especially in her relationships. Most of her relationships were based on my personal experiences.”

“joojihoon_19 asked about why you paired Ji Hye with Jae Joong instead of Junsu… Hey chagiya, someone asked about us too! Shinhwaxprincess asked about who’s the dominant one…see I give in to you so much that people think I am a wimp now…” Changmin pouted at Na Ra.

“Yes I want to know that too! I was really such a poor guy in this story…” Junsu frowned.

“Awww but didn’t I hint at someone really nice for you at the end?” I winked at Boa. “Well, I will address the relationships. And Changmin, we all know it’s you being sweet by giving in to her. Isn’t it right, Na Ra?” Na Ra replied with a guilty smile.

“Now we can go on to today’s topic. I had planned to finish the guys in one chapter but I think it will be too long so I am breaking it up. It will still be quite a long chapter since we are talking about the guys and the character development for them is more complex.”

“See she likes us more. We get more airtime here too! I guess she can’t help it since we are all so hot…” Jeong Hee stabbed Yoo Chun in the rib as he rambled away.

“As you can probably see by now, there are no true good or bad characters in this story. This is because most people are like this. Nobody is ever really pure good or bad. Most of the time, people have many sides to them. Since Yunho was one of the main characters that sparked off this story, I will start with him first. I think it will be a long episode today!” I set my spoon down.

“Yunho’s character was actually based on a few people. Yunho’s competence in dance as well as his travels overseas to study dance were all based on a real guy’s experience. Remember the guy who gave the hot dance? It’s based on his life. He’s popular with the girls as well. Like the real guy, his character is one of a free spirit. He’s a dreamer and he’s not afraid to do the things he likes. Thus, it becomes hard for him to commit because he is simply one of those who are destined for a traveling and free life. Oh remember that conversation in the café where he shared about his travels with Ji Hye? It was based on a real conversation a friend of mine had with the real guy.”

I took another sip of chigae and continued.

Yunho’s background story was loosely based on the real Yunho’s life story. He once mentioned in Ya Shim Man Man that he had to work since young and he had a tough life. The part about the abuse and his father dying is not real of course but it sets the tone for Yunho’s attitude towards relationships along with his personality.” Yunho nodded quietly.

“I wanted to show another theme through Yunho and Yoo Chun which was that childhood influences often affect us a lot more than we expect. Yunho was more aware of this than Yoo Chun. He knew his fear and he kept himself protected from hurt by not getting into anything more than casual relationships. There were many people I saw who showed they were haunted by childhood experiences which went on to form problems in their adult relationships. Most of the time, they are in denial.”

I grinned as I prepared to address the next part.

“I am sure some of you are intrigued by Yunho’s sexual preferences. Well… they were also based on a real person. He was also confused about what he wanted and seemed to have bisexual preferences. So yes, this part is also real. In case you are wondering, the screaming, glaring Hee Chul was based on a real gay person as well so that three-way relationship did happen in real life.” I chuckled.

“Even though, he really liked Ji Hye, he was unable to overcome himself and chose escapism. This is the main difference between his character and Yoo Chun. Yoo Chun was closed to the idea of commitment while Yunho was closed to the idea of love itself.”

Yunho sighed. “And I have to be alone in the end…”

“I am sorry Yunho. I really do like you and I tried so hard to let someone else take this role but I think you are the one who can carry it off the most.” I apologized sincerely and ran to the table to get some kimchi. I ran back to my seat with a huge plate of kimchi.

“Now to Yoo Chun. Ah Yoo Chun is one of the most surprising characters in this story. His was a character that grew by itself. I had not planned for so much of his character development initially but as I wrote, I found myself developing his character more and more until he became one of the most developed characters in the story. He is a very special character indeed.”

“Baby, you’ve got the right man. Can’t help being a leading man wherever I go.” He grinned at Jeong Hee.

I rolled my eyes. “Yoo Chun’s character means a lot of things to different people in this story. Yoo Chun was based on a real hip hop choreographer I know. He’s very knowledgeable about hip hop and is very serious about his craft. Yoo Chun’s character is the same. He is serious about his work and is decisive when decisions have to be made be it about accepting jobs or getting Ji Hye the apartment. Yet, he is completely confused when it comes to matters that concern his heart. He looks rough on the outside but is actually gentle and caring inside. This is the character of Yoo Chun.”

Yoo Chun nodded furiously. He turned to everyone and patted his chest “I am a nice and caring person!”

“You can see that Yoo Chun may be brash and sarcastic with his words but most of the time, there is a lot of love behind them. He pokes fun of Na Ra because he adores her. He makes threats in front of Changmin’s parents because he is fighting for Changmin. Behind his endless jokes at Ji Hye, he really cares about her to the point that he hurts when she does.” Yoo Chun smiled gently at Ji Hye.

“Like Yunho, Yoo Chun had a very casual dating life and shared the inability to commit. This was based on the real Yoo Chun’s comments that he has no plans to get married. I do believe this may be due to his troubled childhood and I chose this as the setting for this character. Inherently, Yoo Chun’s character in the story actually craves love deep inside but is afraid of it turning out wrong like his parents did. He actually has a very child like side to him.”

“Child-like?” Yoo Chun blinked.

“Yes, Yoo Chu is actually a very deep feeling person inside. This is why he sets himself to help Changmin and feels pain for Ji Hye. If you remember the scene where Ji Hye caught him crying in his sleep, Yoo Chun was sleeping in a fetal position. Usually, people who sleep in this position have an innate sense of insecurity. Yoo Chun was denying the person inside even without him knowing. This is why he cries in his sleep…”

“I DON’T CRY!” Yoo Chun suddenly stood up.

“Yoo Chun…sit down.” Ji Hye pulled him back.

“He also chose escapism like Yunho. Like I mentioned in his club scene, he would rather face the insanity of the club even if he knew it was insanity and hypocrisy that he lived in. This was his way of dealing with pain. Thus, it was this way of life he returned to after Jeong Hee left. So there you have it, a deeply emotional Yoo Chun who tries to believe otherwise and escapes into a life of indulgence and meaningless trysts until he meets Jeong Hee. The difference is Yoo Chun was willing to face himself eventually while Yunho never really did even to the end. Truthfully, Yoo Chun’s character is rough around the edges, but very lovable.”

Yoo Chun calmed down a little. “Okay…I am lovable…that’s not too bad…”

“Now, Changmin. He is the guy we don’t really hear about.” I stuck my tongue with a guilty expression. Changmin sighed loudly “Yes, you realize NOW?…I make such pathetic appearances…”

“Awww Changmin-shi…come have some meat.” I gave him a juicy piece of meat to which his eyes brightened up immediately.

“He’s very quiet, which isn’t quite like the real Changmin but speaks when he needs to. I wanted to use him to show another side of dancers. People sometimes have an over-glamorized picture of dancers. People seem to think dancers wear flashy clothes and go clubbing like mad but frankly, a lot of dancers lead far more down to earth lives. They wear very plain clothes once they leave the stage and go home after shows. Some hardly club at all. Some of the serious dancers even abstain from alcohol and late nights so as to stay in tip-top condition. There are also those who party like mad but I am sure Yunho and Yoo Chun has already covered that.”

“Hey we are people with interesting lives!” Yunho and Yoo Chun were waving their chopsticks in protest.

“Yes Yoo Chun, to the point that Changmin had to go save you in your drunkenness.” Yoo Chun suddenly dived his eyes to his food again.

“Changmin is a calming influence in the story. He steps in to save Ji Hye from the other girls when she first joined the team. He’s also the one who notices Na Ra’s predicament when others failed to. Because of his quiet demeanor, he sees a lot more than others does. This makes him more sensitive to the things and people around him. Thus, he is also the one who comes in during the stage when Yoo Chun lost himself to alcohol and girls.”

Changmin suddenly looked up and smiled brightly. “Hey, I sound like a hero…”

“Yet under that quiet exterior, he is very focused and clear minded as well. In this aspect, he is similar to Jeong Hee. His focus makes him a good dancer and he had little doubts about professing his love for Na Ra once he realized it. Even though he’s younger, his maturity and ability to stay clear-minded surpasses that of his hyungs such as Yoo Chun.” Changmin nodded proudly. Na Ra was beaming with pride.

“He is naturally sweet and thus he often gives in to Na Ra. Yet, he can be firm when he wants to. Just remember the scene where he literally forced Na Ra to come clean with her feelings. That was a moment that showed a very manly side of Changmin.” Na Ra curled shyly onto Changmin as I winked at her.

“Well, this is pretty much the overview for these three guys. Before we end the segment today, Let me share more of the real events in this story. Besides the things I mentioned in the main interview, I will share other true event anecdotes at the end of every episode.”

“Oh sounds like more gossip!” Na Ra exclaimed and clapped happily.

“Ha no, it’s not always gossip. I am sure you guys remember that I said the green van Junsu operates really exists in real life? I saw it in Taiwan and the chef was a really sincere and happy-go-lucky guy. I shan’t talk too much about this until I talk about Junsu in the next episode…”

“I still have to wait for another episode? Why am I always waiting…” He frowned.

“You are not the only one. She hasn’t talked about me either.” Jae Joong sighed.

“I will talk about you guys in the next episode! Speaking of the van guy, remember the autograph book? The real guy really had a big roll of papers and it was full of colorful messages. I left a message in there as well. So this bit was real too.”

Junsu flashed his version of the book at the camera and smiled widely.

“Do you guys remember the scene where Junsu held Ji Hye’s hand as she cried after she broke up with Yunho? That’s real too. A guy friend who was really sweet sat down and held my hand when I cried after a break up.” A warm feeling filled my heart thinking of that time.

“Since you guys were so curious about the hot dance, you might want to know that there really is going to be a major dance festival in Beijing coming up soon. People are really going to be dancing over the great wall. I would have loved to go but unfortunately I can’t. The dancer who inspired Yunho’s character is going but I am not, so NO HOT GOSSIP for you guys!”

Everyone threw their arms up in disappointment. Someone mumbled “And I thought we would have something to gossip about over tea later!”

“Too bad! Now for the last bit today, remember the way Jae Joong debuted? I took it from Malgolpy’s debut and Hyori’s role in her recent music drama so yeah I guess you can say this was pretty much real as well.”

I glanced at the empty table that once had food.

“You guys finished EVERYTHING while I was talking?!!!” I screamed. Everyone looked at the ceiling, walls, floor….everywhere except me.

“I WANT FOOD! I AM HUNGRY! JUNSU, JAE JOONG, GO MAKE ME SOMETHING!!!” I ran after them with my spoon threatening to make a painful dent in their heads.

“Sorry, the author has gone a little mad from hunger. We will continue this next time! Remember to send in your questions if you have any!!” Changmin shouted over the mess of screaming voices in the background.

“Yes, we have come to the end of the story. We have heard that some of you are interested in what brought about the story as well as the characters themselves. Thus, we have created the next few episodes to address all the things you may been curious about!” Changmin nodded as he looked at Na Ra.

A wave of applause rose in the studio where the whole cast was seated in comfortable couches. Most of us had a cushion or soft toy and everyone was in smiles. A big colourful sign with the words “Colored Rhythms” hung above a huge television screen behind.

“We will be your host for the whole special segment…” Changmin started.

“Yes, we definitely deserve to be the host, given the little airtime we had during the story!” Na Ra blurted much to everyone’s laughter. Changmin looked slightly embarrassed. “Yes, chagiya…” He mumbled.

“Without further a due, let’s put our hands together for the author, yippie-shi!” I stood up feeling absolutely embarrassed by the sudden attention. I bowed and sat down quickly.

“So yippie-shi, please tell us how this story started.” Na Ra brought the microphone to my face. I jumped a little as I found myself staring at the microphone along with many pairs of eyes on me suddenly.

“I had wanted to write a story after reading all the wonderful fan fics on soompi. I didn’t have much of an idea until I went to Taiwan for a dance festival and met two interesting characters who gave me the inspiration from which the entire story developed…”

“Oh which two characters?!!” Na Ra looked around the cast curiously.

“It’s actually one of the characters Yunho was based on and the other is Junsu.” I smiled.

“I knew I was important!” Junsu gave Yunho a high five.

“I thought it would be me. I am such a happy, bubbly and infectious person am I not?” Na Ra pouted.

“I met a very good dancer who provided the background setting for Yunho’s life and the happy chef who runs the green van. So yes, they are both based on real people.” I laughed.

I continued “From there, I decided to write a story about the life of dancers behind the scenes as well as explore the different types of modern relationships through different characters. I hoped to write a story people can relate to and see it happening in their lives so a lot of it was based on real people and real events. I will slowly discuss the different themes as I explain the different characters.”

“Then we MUST talk about the girls first!” Na Ra jumped up from her seat.

“No, we should talk about the guys first.” Changmin rebutted. Na Ra shot him a glare which resulted in a look of defeat on his face.

“Yaa! Changmin, stand up to your girlfriend! Don’t make us lose face!” Yoo Chun shouted from his seat. Changmin looked at him and tried to look courageous, much to everybody’s amusement.

“We WILL talk about the girls first right?” Na Ra patted Changmin’s arm. Changmin turned to the guys apologetically and mumbled “Sorry guys, let’s be gentlemanly and let the girls go first.”

All the guys in the room shook their head as they sighed and hung their head low. Someone was murmuring “We should have asked Yoo Chun to do it…he will give Na Ra a run for her money…”

Na Ra was obstinately oblivious to the men’s disappointment and sat down beside me.

“So who shall we start with?” Na Ra smiled widely.

“We’ll start with you then.” I smiled.

“In writing about the life of dancers, I had hoped to explore this theme through the girls and not just Ji Hye alone. Na Ra was important in keeping the light moments of the story. However, behind her bubbly personality, she also had her dreams to be a competent dancer and also faced pressures like the rest. Her bubbly personality was based on a real life dance junior of mine whom we fondly call “the ball”. Not that she is fat or anything, but she is really cute just like Na Ra.”

“I am cute!” Na Ra was bouncing off her seat.

“Na Ra was also important is examining one aspect faced by many dancers which is the problem of weight control. There are many a times you would find dancers complaining and whining about managing their weight. It is common to find girls or even guys examining their bodies in front of the studio mirrors. Losing weight is not just for looking good to the dancers as it affects our performance as well. Thus, it became a problem of anorexia and bulimia for some dancers. I know real life cases and how traumatic it can be. This can often lead to depression and even affect their health in the long run. I chose Na Ra because even the happiest people will have their share of pain.”

Na Ra nodded quietly as Jeong Hee patted her head gently.

“Being a simple and unpretentious person, Na Ra found little friends in Black Rap’s competitive environment. Na Ra also becomes a friend to Ji Hye in a foreign environment and becomes a pillar of support to her. She is also the one who introduces Junsu to Ji Hye and watches her through her turmoils.”

Na Ra turned to flash a warm smile at Ji Hye to which Ji Hye returned gladly.

“Boa is the dancer in a team that many would choose as a role model. She’s that prima donna who’s good but a little aloof. She’s the one everyone hopes to be and yet feel envy for. She was also based upon a dancer I knew. She started the story being aloof. She’s not exactly bitchy, just not too concerned with anything else outside dance.” Boa smiled at the mention of her part.

“However, when it comes to dance, she becomes dead serious. She represents the hard work dancers have to put in to stay on top. In a world where one disappears easily unless you were really at the top, many dancers have suffered blood, sweat and tears for their passion. There is not a single serious dancer I know who has not suffered some form of injury at some point or other or still suffers from the effects of a busted ankle, weak knee, aching back and so on. Yet, with all the pain, many continue because that’s how much some love it. Dance is really driven by passion. It may look sadistic to others but asking them to stop is honestly difficult. Even in dance companies, dancers perform even when they are sick unless they are bedridden.”

Everyone turned to look at Boa with a look of awe.

“That’s why Boa would be one of the main influences to push Ji Hye when Ji Hye loses focus and in a way, they share a competitor’s friendship. They had a friendship that was forged by respect for each other as dancers. Eventually, the friendship grows deeper to something more.” I gave Boa the thumbs-up.

“Next would be Jeong Hee. She’s the girl who tames the bad boy!” I laughed. Jeong Hee blushed as Yoo Chun looked down shyly.

“Like Na Ra’s character, I wanted to show a contrast in Jeong Hee’s character. On the outside, she looked like a normal sweet girl whom people can just walk over. Yet, compared to many other characters in the story, she is fiercely strong and clear about what she wants. Unlike Ji Hye, Na Ra and the guys who were often unclear about their loves, Jeong Hee knew clearly what she could and could not accept. Behind that angelic smile was a woman who knew to stand up for herself. She knew when to say no to Yoo Chun’s inability to commit and leave when she knew her friend was in pain. In this way, her simplicity in character and strength formed a sharp contrast to Yoo Chun and became an attraction to Yoo Chun. In a way, she had a mature innocence that Yoo Chun did not have.”

Yoo Chun looked at Jeong Hee gently and kissed her on the cheek. Everyone went “awwwww…”

“And of course there is Ji Hye. She bears my dreams to give it all up and pursue a career in dance. I once spoke to a well known hip hop choreographer who told me honestly it was hard for a foreign dancer to survive in their industry which was already so competitive. Foreigners would be ostracized because the local dancers were already facing so much competition. This is the stage Ji Hye goes through initially before she matures as a dancer and performer. Ji Hye is honestly a lucky example. Many more never go that far.”

I hesitated for a while.

“No offence to Sun Ye fans but she wasn’t my first choice for Ji Hye initially. I was troubled over who to represent Ji Hye for a long time. I wanted someone who wasn’the normal sweet, pretty thing. I wanted a girl that had style and won by a certain X-factor and talent rather than just looks at first glance. After mulling over it a long time, Sun Ye came closest to the Ji Hye I had in mind.”

“I didn’t do too badly!” Ji Hye laughed.

“Like some of you said, Ji Hye wasn’t your usual crying, weak damsel-in-distress. She was courageous for taking the step to try a new life but yet there were times she would succumb to insecurity and her troubles in love causes her to lose sight of her goals as well. She had her moments of weakness like when she broke up with Yunho, lost focus on her dance, her indecision with Junsu and so on but she never failed to stand up even if it took a little encouragement from those around her like Yoo Chun, Na Ra, Boa and Junsu..”

“However,” I continued “One can see her soft side when it comes to Yoo Chun and the loves in her life. This is the you see her as a woman. She adores Yoo Chun, got swept off her feet by Yunho, broke her heart and so on. With Junsu, she probably knew of his feelings deep inside but remained oblivious to it for a long time. Her inability to deal with this is her weakness, a weakness shared by many women. It was only later in the story when she finally decides to leave Jae Joong for his good that one starts to see more maturity and strength in her. She learns and grows through her experiences.”

“So that’s the overview of the girls. You will learn more about them when we talk about the relationships in this story.”

“But we must cover the guys first!” Yoo Chun and Jae Joong shouted.

“Yes I agree!” Junsu waved excitedly at us with Yunho and Changmin nodding furiously.

I laughed and continued “Some of you may also wonder how much truth there is in this story so I will also address this in the later specials. As a teaser, do you all remember that hot dance scene between Yunho and Ji Hye when they met?”

“YESSSSS???” Everyone leaned forward in anticipation.

“Hee…that was real.” I looked down and blushed furiously.

“Woo hoo!! Someone had a hot dance in real life!!” Everyone clapped and whistled. Yunho was laughing loudly to himself.

“Oh stop laughing!!” I threw my cushion at Jae Joong who was practically rolling over.

“Well everyone, we have come to the end of part one. If you have any questions you would like to ask the author regarding the story or characters, please feel free to do so in your comments and she will address it! At the end of the specials, we also have a little surprise for you!” Na Ra jumped in front of the camera while the rest were fighting a pillow war behind.

“See you guys in the next episode!”

This must be the longest chapter I have ever written. I hope it’s long enough for you guys! I didn’t want to stop the flow so there you go, FINAL CHAPTER.

This must be the MOST number of OSTs I ever used for a chapter…FOUR!! Play the OSTs! I swear my hair stood on end when I wrote the first OST scene….wah simply amazing…I wished I was there!! I was so excited when I was writing it. I hope you will feel it too

It was SO EXCITING to write it hahaha!!

This chapter was quite a grand piece of work to me haha

IMPORTANT OST CHAPTER OK?? You can see I am very excited

———————————————————————-

I found myself staring at an extravangantly huge banner of Jae Joong hanging outside the Olympic Stadium.

“You brought me here…to see Jae Joong’s concert?” The words were coming out of my mouth like pieces of bricks.

“It’s his biggest concert to date. Don’t you think you should support him?” He smiled yet again it didn’t look like a genuine smile. I had mixed feelings. I didn’t know whether to feel happy or sad and whether I should feel graititude towards him.

“I just…didn’t expect that this is where you wanted to bring me to.” I looked at the banner again.

“Does it matter?” He paused. “If you are really over him, it should just be like going to a good friend’s concert right?” He emphasized the last sentence.

I struggled to answer. Thank goodness, I was saved by the entrance of a very bubbly girl.

“You two are here already!” Na Ra ran over. I thanked her inside for saving me from an awkward situation.

Why did I feel awkward?

“You are here too! You didn’t tell me you were coming. Are the rest here as well?” I looked around.

“Yes they are on the other side but there’s too many people so you can’t see them.” She pointed to another side of the stadium.

She was right. Jae Joong’s fanbase had grown tremendously. There were thousands of fans outside the stadium queuing to get in. There were so many banners, posters, lightboards and decorations that it was blinding. Every corner I turned, there was a T-shirt or a poster screaming “I Love Hero” in my face.

Well at least these girls had a lot more courage than I did.

“Let’s go before we get buried in the crowd. I have priority passes that will get us in without queuing. We will be able to sit in front.” Junsu started pulling me towards one of the side entrances.

“How did you get these tickets? Aren’t those tickets the type with backstage passes as well? They must be really hard to get with all these people killing each other for tickets!” I tried to ask him over the surrounding noise.

He didn’t answer.

*Junsu’s POV*

I clutched the tickets in my hand tightly.

“Junsu, I honestly don’t know what is going to happen. I just have the feeling that if you want to know Ji Hye’s feelings, bring her to this concert.” Boa slowly pushed two passes towards me. We were having lunch at dad’s restaurant after she asked me out.

I stared at the tickets. They were tickets to Jae Joong’s concert.“

It’s his biggest concert ever. Probably majority of his fans are going to be there. I have already heard news that many are flying in for this. This is Jae Joong at his best, the peak of his career. It is the night before you two fly back. If you are willing to take the chance, bring her here. ” She said firmly.

“Does Jae Joong know?” I looked at her.

“He doesn’t. I think he still hasn’t figured out his own feelings about Ji Hye. He’s been looking a little out of sorts recently as well.”

“I will think it over.”

I decided to take my chance.

An answer was better than no answer at all.

“Let’s go before we get buried in the crowd. I have priority passes that will get us in without queuing. We will be able to sit in front.” I pulled her towards the entrance.

I didn’t know if anything was going to happen at all. After all, even Boa didn’t know. She sounded like Jae Joong had no clue as well. Yet, I also felt that my answer would be found here.

Tonight would be the night.

—————————————-

*Ji Hye’s POV*

I had to stop myself from gasping.

The Olympic stadium was FULL.

It was full of screaming fans, blinking lights, banners that stretched across blocks and all kinds of fancy arrangements. One block of fans had even managed to arrange themselves such that the lights that held spelt “Hero”.

PLAY OST: OPENING ‘O’ IN THE END

A loud siren rang all over the stadium, causing the fans to scream in a mad frenzy. As the lights dimmed, the whole stadium litted up in a sea of twinkling red lights. It felt just like a national parade with a sea of blinking lights thumping in precise unison to the music like heartbeat.

“Ji Hye, isn’t it cool? Red is Hero’s color!” Na Ra shouted from a few seats away. I nodded and smiled.

You have really gone so far.

I am so proud of you.

The sacrifice was worth it.

You are a star now as you wanted.

The huge screens on the stage blasted exquisitely designed imagery. Pyrotechnics were firing sparks and explosions on stage. Lights flickered and danced in the night. Music pulled our breaths with every note. The stadium had metamorphosized into his playground.

It was a magnificent display of stageworks. Even Yunho who was sitting a few seats away looked impressed. To people like us, we knew the amount of money, time and effort that went into a production of such scale.

The fans screamed at every break. They never seemed to get tired of it. In fact, their screaming grew louder and louder each time. The lights were moving in amazing synchronicity.

The deep pumping sounds in the opening music made one’s hair stand on end and pushed one’s heartbeat faster and faster.

It was an awesome opening.

A haunting melody flowed into the air as the heavy beats faded away. It was inviting yet mysterious at the same time like something unexpected was heading our way.

His voice arose all over the stadium, the fans’ screams were threatening to bring the stadium down.

He was speaking in a soft, sexy voice, declaring a pledge for his nation of fans. Looking at the sea of red, he did have a nation of fans to boast of.

“We must pull together…

For the ONE NATION…

No hurt…

Without tears…

No hate anymore…

No fight…

No more woe…”

The wild sounds of electric guitar pierced through the air as the dancers were introduced onto the stage one by one. Lights jumped and changed colours quickly as one dancer went on one after another. The screens changed pictures and names in loud colours. I knew most of them. They were brilliant as they jumped onto the stage and showed their stuff. I nearly jumped out of my seat cheering for them.

Finally, it came to the name everyone had been waiting for.

“HERO!!”

The fans screamed their lungs out.

The music became louder till it deafened the screams.

He leapt onto the stage in an effortless jump.

I gasped.

He was shining.

Not just because he was in costume.

But because he was truly…A STAR.

As the opening music drew to its climatic end, the crowd was all warmed up for an awesome concert ahead.

Screams echoed throughout the massive stadium.

STOP OST: OPENING ‘O’ IN THE END
PLAY OST: PHANTOM

I nearly jumped in my seat when I heard the opening notes of the next song. It was a song where Jong Min oppa and I had worked on when Jae Joong debuted. I looked over to Junsu excitedly and screamed “I helped to choreograph this! Oh gosh I am so excited!” He laughed at my outburst.

I let out a happy sigh as I fell back into my seat.

They had made some changes to the arrangement but they had kept most of the spirit of the choreography. There was also a bigger dance team this time. They all looked so sharp doing it that I felt an overwhelming sense of pride as a co-choreographer.

As he sang, I could feel all the effort he must have put in over the last few years even though I was not around to see it for myself. I could see the endless hours of rehearsals, vocal trainings, workouts and the amount of sweat and tears that made him who he is today.

The journey must have been so ardous but you made it.

It was a journey I did not accompany you on.

I would have wanted to

But in a way, I am glad I didn’t.

The sacrifice was worth it.

You proved us all.

I am so proud of you.

I felt tears glistening in my eyes as I watched him sing, dance and teased the crowd. He had become so good at his craft. He made multiple costume changes throughout the concert and his old songs were also given a new lease of life with new arrangements.

He had grown so much as a singer and performer. He not only had more stamina, but he sang powerfully and pulled the audience into his charm as he brought us into his musical journey. His dance was cleaner and more polished than before. He knew the right words to say and when to say it that made the crowd squeal in excitement. He knew when to tease the crowd with a little show of skin to make the girls go weak in the knees and surrender in longing screams. I could just imagine the flood of pictures that would happen tomorrow across major media and forums.

I had to admit, even I felt my heart pounding against the walls of my body from watching his performance. He was handsome, sexy and an extremely captivating performer. His stage presence was overbearing and commanded all of your attention on him when he was on stage.

It was impossible to tear your eyes away.

I couldn’t.

I was breathless.

I was mesmerized.

Yes, you’ve done it.

STOP OST: PHANTOM

Two hours whizzed by and it was near the end of the concert.

He showed up alone on stage in a white shirt and matching pants. He made the clothes look good.

“Did you all enjoy the concert?” He asked loudly. The crowd answered with a resounding yes.

“I am happy to hear that.” He laughed happily. You could feel the crowd share his joy.

He kept quiet for a while and the crowd went quiet as well.

“It’s been more than three years since I debuted. You have all been with me all the way. I am so touched. Despite whatever you hear out there, you should know I have been all alone all this time. I gave all my love to you all. You are all my girlfriends.” He looked around the stadium. The crowd screamed. You could even hear some girls breaking into tears.

“You all know how hard it was for me to be here. I wouldn’t be here without you all. I thank you all from the bottom of my heart.” He bowed. More girls started crying.

“There were many times I felt lonely but you have all kept me company.” He smiled lovingly at his fans. Girls were wailing by now.

“You should also know that there were many times I said I hoped to find a partner in my life…”

Someone in the crowd screamed loudly “MEEEEEE!!!!!”

The whole stadium laughed.

“Hahaha I already said you are all my girlfriends. I have always loved you all and will always love you all.” He spoke with sincerity that one could feel from his words.

He kept quiet again and looked down. The stadium went quiet except for an occasional sound of a girl crying somewhere.

“Because I love all of you, I want you to hear this from me.”

The stadium went dead silent in anticipation.

“There were many times I said I hoped to find that special someone. Well…there is someone I like.”

Dead silence.

Sounds of girls breaking into tears and sniffs started cracking the silence from all over the stadium.

“Don’t cry. It hurts me to to see you all cry.” He looked around and smiled sadly.

“I haven’t been able to tell her how I feel. She has suffered and I don’t know if she will accept me at all. In fact, I don’t even know…if she will ever know at all.” He took in a deep breath and looked down.

He looked up again and continued. “But because I love all of you, I want you to hear it from me and not just a newspaper. I hope you will all give me a chance to share a little of my love for you with her. I promise my love for you all will never change to the day I die but I ask this of you all…please give me a chance.” He bowed deeply and stayed there.

The initial sounds of crying in the crowd was joined by a wave of more crying sounds. It grew louder and louder till it was the only sound left in the stadium.

After a long time, he finally stood up straight again. There were tears running down his face as well. The girls cried even more. Even I felt heartache.

He must really like Boa to do this.

“It breaks my heart to hear you all crying. I don’t know what to do to make you feel better except this last song…especially for YOU. I have even invited some friends here with me. You should know them too because they are so famous as well. I hope you can feel my heart.”

I got up and turned to leave. I could not stand to hear any more of his declaration of love for Boa.

PLAY OST: WHATEVER THEY SAY

That was until I heard the first line.

“I don’t care what everybody says…”

I stopped dead in my tracks.

“What song were you humming just now?” I hummed a few bars to him.

“Oh that song. It’s nice.”

“Yes, I love it. Can you sing it for me?”

“Ya!! Your boyfriend is a singer with chart-topping hits and you want me to sing other people’s songs?!”

I knew this song. It was the song he never wanted to sing to me. I turned around slowly to face the stage again.

“Baby Girl, You are my lucky one

Out of all the many people, you and I are the most similar to each other

But everyone wants us to break up

Oh, If this is reality, then don’t believe in destiny”

I felt his heart flowing from every word.

“Whatever they say, don’t listen girl

All they’re doing is being envious of us

I just hope you will believe in whatever I tell you

Whatever they say, I don’t care, I love you

I can’t lose you, its so hard”

I cupped my mouth with my hands as I tried to stop myself from crying out from the tears running freely down my face.

“Baby, I don’t know what to say

I just have to tell you that my heart will never change

People just want us to compromise with the world

If that will make me lose you, then I will go against the world”

Memories flooded back into my mind…

The first time we met…

The times we sat down and shared each other’s burdens…

His daily greetings of affection…

The night we made love…

The nights we cuddled to sleep…

The times we stole moments for each other…

The walk by the river…

“Whatever they say, don’t listen girl

All they’re doing is being envious of us

I just hope you will believe in whatever I tell you

Whatever they say, I don’t care, I love you

I can’t lose you, its so hard”

The memories played in my mind like it happened just yesterday.

“I wanted to let you go just for your benefit

But the love and trust you’ve shown me gives me courage”

I am sorry I left you. Yet you still believed in me.

“Whatever they say, don’t listen girl

All they’re doing is being envious of us

I just hope you will believe in whatever I tell you

Whatever they say, I don’t care, I love you

I can’t lose you, its so hard

Oh no don’t leave…”

Yes, it was so hard.

“Whatever they say, don’t listen girl

All they’re doing is being envious of us

They are different from us so they will never understand us

Whatever they say, I don’t care, I love you

I can’t lose you

Baby girl, you are my lucky one”

You are the one.

As he finished the song, he pulled his necklace out and gently kissed the object that hung at the end…

A shiny silver ring.

I gasped.

“Ji Hye…” Junsu was standing next to me with sadness on his face. I turned to look at him

“Junsu…” I muttered his name as my tears fell.

He looked at me sadly.

STOP OST: WHATEVER THEY SAY

———————————————————————

I walked along the backstage corridor quietly as I wiped my tears away. I waited in a quiet corner as I heard him say his final thank you. A few minutes later, people started flooding into the backstage.

He saw me.

He quickly dashed over and pulled me to a quiet corridor before anyone could grab hold of him. We could hear people shouting after us as we ran.

“I will be back in a while!” He shouted as he pulled me and ran.

We finally came to a final corner and we were both panting heavily from running.

“This feels like an action movie…” I was trying to catch my breath.

He panted and stood up straight. His face softened.

“I didn’t know you were going to be here. I had prayed you would come but I thought maybe you would see it from some news or video but….anyway I presume you know who I was talking about…so…” He looked down and played with his fingers.

“I am surprised you remembered.” I looked down as well.

“Of course I do…” He whispered softly.

We stood there like two idiots looking at the floor.

“Will you come back…please?” He slowly looked up at me.

“I don’t know Jae Joong…so much has changed…I don’t know if I still know or can do this anymore…” I turned around and started walking. I truly didn’t know if I was prepared for him to come back into my life again.

“You are leaving again! You already left without a word three years ago! If you don’t care, then why are you here?!” He started calling after me.

My mind went blank as an earlier scene floated into my mind…

“Ji Hye…”

“Junsu…”He kept quiet as he looked at me sadly.

“Go.” He finally whispered.

I burst into tears. “Junsu…I…” My heart hurt so much to see him look so sad.

“Ji Hye. I asked for your decision, not for you to love me. You have made your decision so go.” He rubbed my tears away gently.

“I am sorry…” I crumbled.

“Ji Hye. Don’t be sorry. I cannot lose what I never had in the first place. The clock in your heart stopped moving the day you left Seoul. We both know that. Everyone knows that.” Tears were forming in his eyes. I could almost hear his heart break.

“But…this is so unfair to you…”

“Ji Hye…isn’t it time for me to let go of myself too? Help me.” He smiled as tears filled his eyes.

I threw my arms around him and hugged him tightly.

“Junsu…you have a heart so wide and a love so deep that I don’t deserve it. I want you to be happy…I really really want you to be happy…” I cried for him.

“I will be happy when you are happy and the person who can make you happy is not me.” He squeezed me tightly as his voice broke from crying.

“There will be someone who will love you for what you truly deserve…” I wiped his tears away.

“Yes there will be. Now go before I change my mind.” He turned away.

“How can you leave again?! How can you be so cruel?!” Jae Joong was becoming delirious.

I didn’t know what to do so I just kept walking.

“Ji Hye! Can’t you see?!” He shouted.

My mind was in a frantic mess.

“JI HYE! IF YOU DON’T LOVE ME, THEN WHY DO YOU STILL WEAR MY RING?!!!” He screamed in agony.

PLAY OST: EVERYTHING

I screeched to a halt.

I felt the band of silver on my finger.

I had forgotten all about it. It had become such a part of me I had forgotten its existence. It had become part of my skin quietly, just like how he had been sealed in the deepest depths of my soul without me knowing. I thought I had shut it all out but they had simply slipped into my very being that it was impossible to put away.

He was a part of me.

He had caught me.

“Ji Hye…it’s been three years…THREE LOOOONNNG TORTUROUS YEARS…I have set you free for three years…how long more do you want to put us through this…hasn’t it been enough for both of us?” He pleaded.

I turned around to find a pained expression on his face.

“Please don’t go again… I nearly died the last time… I will really die this time to watch you leave in front of me.” He looked down with defeat on his face.

I kept quiet.

He slammed himself against the wall and pouted.

I laughed.

Yes, I laughed.

“How can you laugh at a time like this?!” He looked at me in total shock with his face washed in tears.

I burst out laughing even harder.

“How can you pout at a time like this?” I shook my head.

He blinked.

He blinked again.

He ran.

Next thing I knew, I had a very sweaty and very excited Jae Joong threatening to squeeze every breath out of me.

“I can feel you! I can feel you! You are finally here!” He hugged me happily.

“What do you mean?” I looked at him in confusion.

“There were many times I thought I saw you but I realized I was just dreaming in my sleep.” He looked at me sheepishly.

I laughed as I nuzzled my nose against his. How cute can he get?

“Yes I am here.” I embraced him with all the love I had.

I think I love you, puppy.

———————————————————

“Thanks Yunho.” I found Yoo Chun standing next to me as we watched the couple from a distance.

“They are such trouble isn’t it?” He sighed. I smiled.

“I had asked her to come back so many times but she always turned me down with some lame excuse. I had to find a way so I was left with no choice but to call you.” Yoo Chun turned to look at me. He looked grateful.

“I didn’t have to do much. She did a great job at the concert anyway.” I looked at them again.

“All of us knew they still loved each other. Boa had been ranting on and on about Jae Joong and that silly necklace of his. I have been talking to Ji Hye so I could tell how absolutely unconvincing she had been in telling me she had forgotten about him. Without you, this would not have been possible. So I thank you for helping me to make her happy.”

I forced a smile and looked down.

“Feeling the pinch of giving her away?” Yoo Chun patted my shoulder.

“Maybe. But this is the least I can do for her.”

For the pain I put you through, this is the least I can do for you.

I hope you will be happy.

“Need me to introduce some good girls to you? Or do you prefer guys? Jeong Hee has some really good friends…Let me think…” Yoo Chun started to form bubbles in his head.

“Er Yoo Chun…I can find a GIRL on my own.” I knocked his arm in jest.

“You are a good man Yunho.” He extended his hand to me.

“I know.” I shook his hand as we found an unspoken understanding.

————————————————————-

“Looks like I will be staying in Taiwan alone in future.” I sighed as I sat alone in the hall after the concert ended. I had asked the rest to go on without me.

“Feeling down?” A female voice sounded behind me. It was Boa. She sat down beside me.

“I am sorry. I don’t know he had this up his sleeve. I think he didn’t really plan for Ji Hye to hear it but I guess she did.” She looked at me apologetically.

“It’s not your fault. She would have made the same decision anyway. I thank you for setting this up.” I looked at her.

“Does it hurt?” She asked softly. I nodded.

“It does but in a way I always knew the outcome so I was already prepared for this. Facing it was painful but… I will live.” I took a deep breath and let it out as I stared into space.

We sat there quietly for a while.

“Junsu…” Her voice rose softly.

“Hmm?” I turned to face her again.

“Remember a long time ago, you said you would teach me how to cook…would you…erm you know…still want to do that?” She stammered as her eyes looked everywhere except at me. It was the first time I had seen her in such a manner. She always looked so strong. Yet at this moment, she seemed so vulnerable and adorable at the same time.

I thought for a second.

“Sure, let’s go.”

We smiled widely to each other we left the hall together.

THE END

————————————————————–

Author’s Notes:

The End. Wow.

I don’t know how to express the feelings I had when I typed THE END.

I was happy because I managed to come so far yet sad because it is finally over…well almost.

I think this must be one of the fastest fics to end on soompi? I started this in may and about a month later, it’s over!

Now, I can go lie down and chill….

WAIITTT!!!!!!!!!!!!

*writer looks confused*

IT’S NOT OVEEERRRR!!!

*writer suddenly remembers and jumps in front of laptop*

WELL, IT’S NOT EXACTLY OVER YET.

I spoke to some of you and it seems there are people curious about how the story came about, things about certain characters and how true this fic is. Thus, please do check out the specials.  I have no plans for a sequel or side stories for now… will think about it if there’s enough demand But this is how I had planned for it to end. I do have ideas for 3 other stories. I am currently working on one story which is available on Soompi. If you are keen to read it, do drop me a message

“You did a great job Yunho!” I cheered him happily as he walked to me after the concert.

“You did a great job too! I will definitely consider using you again for other shows.” He put his arm around me as we watched the snowing confetti.

“So you will be staying for a week after this?”

“Yes, how about you?”

“I haven’t been back in a while so I will stay for about a week too. Yoo Chun spoke to me about helping him out with some classes. Are you happy to see him getting married?” He smiled warmly.

“Yes I am. I have been waiting for him to settle into a happy family for a long time. He really deserves a shot at a happy family.” I knew Yoo Chun’s family history enough to know that taking a shot at marriage was probably a huge step for him. He must like Jeong Hee a lot.

“Hey you are spacing out. You could have had a shot at a happy family too you know.” He grinned.

“What do you mean?” I stared at him for a while. He just smiled.

“Huh? You are not talking about having a happy family with YOU right?” I had a look of disbelief.

“Yaaa!! Don’t look so surprised! I can be a good family man too!” He tried to look serious. I arched a brow and turned my eyes to the stage again.

“Yunho, we both know family man is not your kind of thing. Doing a big show, co-ordinating hundreds of people, yes, but family…” I looked at him. “…No.”

His eyes looked down. “If you were willing then…I really could have tried you know…” He said softly.

“Yunho…” I put my arms around his waist. “You could have tried but we both know you are happier like this. There are some people in this world who are not meant to be tied down. You are one of them.” I looked into his eyes gently.

He looked down like a boy. “Maybe…”

“I never asked you. Whatever happened to Hee Chul?” I pursed my lips mischievously.

“Ji Hye! He was just a passing thing!” He insisted as he pushed his face into mine.

“Okay okay I get it!” I pushed his face away laughing.

“Oh the bodyguard is back.” He broke away on seeing Junsu walk over to us. I laughed.

“Ji Hye, Na Ra came over and asked if we want to go for supper.” Junsu looked at Yunho before he asked me.

“Yunho, do you need me to stay behind or anything?”

“It’s all right. You can go. We will have a debrief tomorrow afternoon in the office. I have to stay behind so you go ahead.”

“Okay I will see you tomorrow then.” I waved and turned around to leave with Junsu.

*Yunho’s POV*

I watched her back become smaller and smaller as she left with Junsu.

I really could have tried if you were willing.

I told Hee Chul the truth after I broke up with her. He was upset but I knew it was better than leading him on like how I had led her on. When I discovered that she stayed in my mind despite my efforts to forget her, I knew she had gotten me.

I fought for a second chance but I was too late. She had made the decision to move on.

Draggy relationships were never my kind of thing. I left Seoul soon after Jae Joong’s showcase when I received new job offers overseas. I never really dated seriously again. I went on dates with different girls but I never felt the desire to go beyond casual dating.

Maybe you are right.

But I really would have tried if you were willing to.

——————————————————-

*Jae Joong’s POV*

I kept quiet all the way during the ride back from SMT concert. Even Min Yong was concerned.

“Jae Joong, are you tired? You seem quiet. You’d usually be doing something stupid by now.” He turned back from the front seat.

“I’m thinking about something.” I looked out of the window. He shrugged and looked to the front again.

Boa’s words lingered in my mind…

“Arggghh!!! Jae Joong ahhh, I don’t believe you!!! You are such a blockhead! What do the girls see in you at all?!!”

“Thanks Boa!”

“Min Yong, I need to ask you something.” I moved closer to the front seat.

*Ji Hye’s POV*

The rest of the week was spent catching up with people. I helped Yoo Chun out with classes and Yunho was giving special classes to Yoo Chun’s new dancers. Yoo Chun had found great potential dancers and I could see them take Black Rap to even bigger places.

Not that Black Rap was not famous. In fact, they were one of the most sought-after groups in the country now. Yoo Chun and Changmin had spent a lot of effort on promoting and training the team.

“I still get girls waiting outside for him! It really irritates me sometimes!” Na Ra huffed as she looked at the group of waiting girls outside the studio. Na Ra always had the theory that a woman should never be too nice to a man. It amused me how she always tries to pretend she was cool when she really cared about Changmin.

“Just ignore them.” Jeong Hee smiled. She sounds like she was speaking from experience.

“Jeong Hee, I bet you get that all the time too.” I chuckled.

She laughed. “Yoo Chun is and will always be a flirt whether he tries to or not.”

“I don’t know how you can take it!” Na Ra peered outside again.

“Na Ra, Changmin loves you to bits. It really isn’t hard to see that. You have him completely under your spell.” Jeong Hee nudged Na Ra.

“Really?” She turned to us and looked down shyly. “Well I guess he does let me have my way most of the time.” She broke into a girlish smile. Whoever said that love changes a person sure knew what he or she was saying.

“Ji Hye ah, how about you? Are you seeing anyone? Junsu?” Na Ra looked at me.

I smiled weakly. “No I have been too busy with work to date. Junsu and I are just flatmates.”

“You really don’t like him at all?”

I sighed. “Some people just want to kill each other after they stay together. We have stayed together for a year and yet I still find him nice. This shows how nice he really is. He takes care of me and we have never fought either. He is getting along really well in his work too so there’s no doubt he will be someone I can depend on in the long run.” I looked away.

“I can’t deny that I am moved by his devotion but I am not sure about what I feel about him. I am trying to figure it out as well.” I sighed again as I looked at the both of them.

“You still can’t forget him.” Na Ra spoke softly. I pursed my lips and looked away. I knew who she was talking about.

“That is already past. We can’t even talk to each other properly anymore. I have…forgotten about him.” I gulped.

“I am sure you will find your true heart one day.” Jeong Hee rubbed my shoulder gently. Her kind presence was assuring.Yoo Chun was definitely marrying the right woman.

“So Jeong Hee, what is your dream wedding gown?” I folded my arms and placed it on the counter excitedly.

“Oh YES! WEDDING GOWN!! What design are you going to go for? We must find you the best!! Make Yoo Chun PAY for it!!” Na Ra started getting excited again.

“I..I don’t know…I haven’t thought about it at all…” She looked down shyly. Whoever said a woman in love was the most beautiful also knew what he or she was saying as well.

“DON’T WORRY JEONG HEE! We will make you the MOST BEAUTIFUL bride EVER, next to Ji Hye and me of course…but you will be GORGEOUS, trust me!” Jeong Hee and I laughed at Na Ra’s gusto.

I am so happy for you guys. I am happy I chose to come back.

—————————————-

The days passed quickly. It was just two days more before Junsu and I head back to Taiwan. By now, I had still not met up with Boa.

I missed her as a friend. I wanted to know how she had been all these years yet I never found the chance to call. I always gave myself excuses not to call.

More correctly put, I never found enough courage to call.

Deep inside, I knew as much as I wanted to know how she had been getting along, I knew Jae Joong would be a part of whatever she would have to tell me. I wasn’t ready to hear about it. Even though thinking about him no longer made me cry, I wasn’t ready to face him be it in real life or through someone else’s words.

As I was walking into Junsu’s father’s restaurant, I saw Boa walking out.

“Hi Boa.” I tried to sound as welcoming as I could.

“Ji Hye!” She looked a little startled.

“Just had lunch with Junsu?” I smiled as I looked into the restaurant.

“Er yes…He didn’t tell me you were coming or else I would have cancelled my other appointment to stay longer.”

“It’s okay, we will find a chance to catch up.” A part me of wondered if that was true.

“Yes, I will see you soon.” She suddenly broke into a wide smile that caught me by surprise.

“Yes…see you…soon then” I looked at her as she left.

“Ji Hye!” I heard Junsu calling from inside.

“Ah Junsu. You met up with Boa? You guys seem to be meeting quite a bit since we came back.” I nudged him.

“Ji Hye.” He had a warning tone in his voice.

“Okay okay, I rest my case.” I looked away like a disappointed girl.

“You haven’t forgotten, have you?” He looked at me expectantly.

I softened. “Yes I have not forgotten.” I remembered our agreement very clearly.

He sensed my discomfort. “Come, try my father’s pizza. It will blow you away. Hawaiian with extra pineapples?” He pulled open a seat for me.

“Yes!” I sometimes thought Junsu knew me better than I did.

After all, he’s been watching over you all these years.

My heart always scrunched up at the thought of that. I had made him use up so much of his youth when he could have been making another woman happy and that woman could have been making him much happier than I did.

“Here you go, extra pineapples. There’s almost half a pineapple in there.” He joked as he sat down.

I tore into my pizza happily. It was the best I ever tasted. Now I knew where Junsu got his culinary talent from.

“Ji Hye.”

“Hmm?” I was engrossed in my pizza.

“You have nothing on tomorrow night right?” He sounded hesitant.

“Yeah, we have to fly the next day so I haven’t really planned anything. I may just ask if the gang wants to do something before we leave.” I continued chowing the pizza down.

“If that’s the case, can you go somewhere with me?”

I looked up at him.

“Sure. Where do you want to go?” He sounded serious.

“You will know tomorrow.” He looked like he was smiling yet he wasn’t.

“Okay then. Sounds mysterious.” I tried to laugh to break the atmosphere. He smiled a little.

I wonder what he had in mind.

“Jong Min hyung, I am so sorry.” I looked at them apologetically and bowed in guilt.

“Jae Joong.” Boa sighed. “You are such a hopeless case.” She looked up and shook her head before she turned to join the rest of the dancers.

Yes Kim Jae Joong, you are indeed a hopeless case to be distracted from someone who left without a word three years ago.

*Ji Hye’s POV*

I couldn’t miss that voice no matter how long I hadn’t heard it.

He sounded as good as I remembered.

In fact, he sounded even better now. His vocals were more polished and powerful than before. He used to lose his breath a little at the faster songs but now he could control his vocals even during a fast number.

I had been standing outside and listening while he was carrying out his rehearsal. Even when he was singing a ballad, his vocals were smooth and he had more depth in his emotions. One could actually feel that he was singing his love out.

I wonder what gave you those emotions?

Was it me?

I must be thinking too highly of myself.

It’s probably Boa.

“Ji Hye, let’s go in. Hero is finishing his last song. We will be starting the combined rehearsal soon.” One of the crew signaled to me.

“I am coming in right now.” I smiled as I joined the crew and went into the venue. I kept myself occupied by talking to the crew and keeping my eyes away from the stage.

“YAHH!! JAE JOONG!! WHAT ARE YOU DAYDREAMING ABOUT?!” Jong Min oppa shouted irritatedly. “You stopped singing on the last part! Now we have to do this ALL OVER AGAIN! AISH WHAT ARE YOU THINKING OF?!!” Jong Min oppa shouted angrily.

I giggled. Jong Min oppa was as irritable as usual when it came to rehearsals.

As they left the stage, I went over to the dancers when I saw Jae Joong out of sight.

“Jong Min oppa…”

“Ah Ji Hye! I haven’t seen you for such a long time!” He slapped my shoulders excitedly. “I heard Ji Hye was assistant show director but I didn’t know it was our Ji Hye!” He laughed happily.

“Ji Hye, it’s good to see you.” Boa smiled at me.

I smiled back awkwardly. I was happy to see her yet there was a feeling tugging at me that felt otherwise.

“Hi Boa.” I sounded a little less than excited.

“Everyone prepare for final rehearsals in half an hour!” Yunho announced loudly over the system.

“Oh we better go now. Let’s catch up later!” Jong Min said happily as he led Boa away.

I stood there feeling stupid. Boa was a good friend. Why did I act that way?

“Ji Hye.”

My heart stopped.

Oh no.

I pursed my lips. Should I turn around? I couldn’t possibly run since he called me at such a close distance?

I turned around slowly as my face looked like a thief who just got caught. I pulled my facial muscles to the most natural smile I could muster.

“Jae Joong…” I smiled at him while my eyes tried to keep myself from looking at him.

Forget natural smile. I looked as natural as a mannequin.

He looked good.

No, good was an understatement.

He looked breathtakingly handsome.

My puppy had grown into a man. He had black hair now. I have always liked him in black hair. His skin was flawless like always. His childlike innocence had a new masculine edge to it. I couldn’t help but steal a few looks at him.

My puppy.

How long have I not thought of him that way?

Three years.

You are someone else’s puppy now.

“Ho..how have you been?” He stammered.

“Erm…good.” I answered briefly.

We were both looking at anywhere else except each other and trying to find something to say.

“Oh I better get going or Yunho will kill me. Erm…good luck for the show later!” I broke the silence.

“Oh er..yeah..okay…er…see you.” He smiled awkwardly as we both turned around and went to our respective waiting areas.

Phew, that was awkward.

As I was walking over to the meeting place, I couldn’t help but feel a smile creep to my face.

——————————————-

“Now for my last song of the night! I hope you will all like this song.” Se7en said sweetly over the microphone as the crowds went crazy. He had brought the crowds to a jumping fervour with Nan Arrayo. Now it sounded like he was going to swoon the crowd with a ballad.

PLAY OST: ONE LAST CRY

*Jae Joong’s POV*

I stood at the side of the stage while watching Se7en perform. There was another group ahead of my slot but I always liked to watch him perform so I came out earlier to catch his performance.

I caught her standing on the other side of the stage. She had changed to a corseted top and skin tight jeans. She had put on a little make up as well. As she stood in the dim backstage, the colourful stage lights contrasted against her and made her look even prettier.

Do you know how hard I have worked to forget you?

I worked so hard for the dreams that we sacrificed our love for…

I slogged day and night so that I will have no space left to think of you

Are you proud of me now?

My eyes drifted to the person next to her.

Junsu.

I remember her telling me about him long ago. I always thought he liked her though she never said it.

Did he win your heart?

Is he the one who stands beside you in your life like he does now?

A familiar feeling of pain hit my heart. It was a feeling I had not felt in a while.

*Junsu’s POV*

I stood next to her as she watched the performance on stage in a satisfied smile. She always looked so alluring when she was absorbed in something.

Are your eyes really watching the stage or somewhere else?

I saw Jae Joong standing on the other side of the stage. He was watching the stage yet I felt he was looking in our direction.

I turned to look at her again.

I thought I would be able to let you go after we parted. Yet fate brought our paths together again. I fell in love with you all over again.

Will I lose?

“You sure about it?” I was fearful.

“If you think I shouldn’t then I won’t…”

I saw her expectant face.

“Ji Hye. We’ve lived together for the past one year. I think I know you well enough to know when you really want to do something.”

“I will go with you but will you promise me something?” I could never win against that face of hers.

“Will you promise me that after we go this time, you will finally decide on your feelings? Will you promise me that you will make a decision and never look back? Don’t pretend that you don’t know what I am talking about because I know you do.”

She kept quiet.

“I am not asking you to love me but I am asking you to decide and never look back. I will respect your decision if that decision will not involve me. But if that decision should have me in it, then give me a chance and don’t look back. I am not asking as your friend Ji Hye. I am asking as a man fighting for his love.”

Maybe I was forcing her but this has been too dragging on too long and it was getting too painful for us. I knew from watching her day in and day out for the last one year.

She finally answered “Yes, I promise you.”

Will I lose?

Then again, how do you lose someone you never had in the first place?

A feeling of uneasiness set in.

*Boa’s POV*

I watched him on the opposite side of the stage.

After all these years, you are still watching her.

I remember you were the first guy who created feelings of warmth in my heart. I remember how you beamed into my life like warm sunshine with that infectious smile.

Is that what liking someone means?

I have no idea.

I never felt this way before.

I only knew dance and nothing else.

I was surprised at the disappointment I felt when you left suddenly even though I knew all along you liked her.

As time went by, I thought it was just a passing feeling. Yet, I never quite met anyone else who gave me the same feelings again.

How could it be?

I am not sure what is going on.

I never really got a chance to know you.

If there was a chance,I would like to know you better.

Yes I would like to know you better, Kim Junsu.

*Ji Hye’s POV*

Se7en was captivating as always with his powerful vocals and heartfelt renditions. However, my attention shifted when I saw his face on the other side of the stage.

I had to admit I was at a loss of how to face him this afternoon. I was lost, frustrated yet happy and excited at the same time.

I had mixed feelings about coming back. I missed the people here yet I felt a sense of uncertainty and fear at the prospect of possibly seeing him again.

I had shut him out of my mind and life for the last three years. I avoided all news and anything that reminded me of him though it was difficult with his rising popularity. I did my best and I thought I had succeeded. I thought it was all over.

It had to be.

Three years is a long time.

Yet I couldn’t deny the happiness I felt when I saw you.

I couldn’t fight the smile that found its way to my face.

I saw Boa standing next to him.

Is she the one who makes you smile now?

Is she the one who now has the place next to you?

I wanted to wish him well but yet I couldn’t find enough strength to wish it from the bottom of my heart.

*Jae Joong’s POV*

I could not watch them any longer so I went backstage and sat down on a bench.

“Can’t stand it?” Boa said softly as she sat down.

“What do you mean?” I tried to look like I didn’t understand her.

“Jae Joong, don’t give me that face. I know when you are lying.” I looked down as she sighed.

“After spending these few years with you guys, I learnt not to pay too much attention to the scandals. It’s not your first scandal anyway. I can’t be bothered to deal with the people who can’t be bothered with the truth.” She said firmly as she looked ahead.

“But to the rest of us who care, the truth matters. And Jae Joong, no matter how you try to hide and deny it, the truth has been too obvious for us to miss…TOO PAINFULLY OBVIOUS.”

I looked at her and looked away again.

“I am not sure myself. I thought I had let it go…”

“Hello? Kim Jae Joong? You MUST be living in a self-created fantasy. You were never and are still not over her. I get so frustrated watching you whenever you are like this.” She threw her arms up in a huff.

“But I think she and Junsu…” I whispered.

“Oh I CAN’T STAND IT anymore! THEY ARE FLATMATES!” She was getting so agitated she looked ready to pounce on me.

“Really?” My eyes widened.

She let out a loud sigh.

“Arggghh!!! Jae Joong ahhh, I don’t believe you!!! You are such a blockhead! What do the girls see in you at all?!!” She rolled her eyes.

“What do you mean?” I looked at her in confusion.

She stared at me as if she was waiting for an answer.

We stared at each other for a long time as I heard Se7en finishing his song.

Suddenly, it hit me as my face widened in realization.

 

PLAY OST: NOON BOO SHIN NAL DEUL

3 December 2004
Rainy Day
Mood: Sad

Dear Diary,

Dear diary, can I truly believe that?

STOP OST: NOON BOO SHIN NAL DEUL

————————————————–

*Jae Joong’s POV*

“And now…the best newcomer award goes to….Hero!”

A wave of thunderous applause filled the hall as my name was announced. I ran up the stage and received the award from a senior I respected.

This was my moment. This was the prize any artiste could win only once in their lifetime and I had it in my hands. As I finished my speech and left the stage, my heart was pumping with happiness and excitement at winning.

“Ji Hye! I…” I caught myself. I had expected her to be waiting for me at the other side of the stage like she always did.

She’s not here.

My eyes looked to the floor as my arms fell limp by my side.

“Hero! Congratulations!”

I smiled forcibly.

“Congratulations on making it!”

I forced myself to smile again.

“You deserved it!”

The smile has plastered itself on my face.

I walked to the changing room as fast as I could and closed the door behind me. It was only behind that door that I could remove the mask that I wore for the world.

PLAY OST: SOMEWHERE DOWN THE ROAD

I slided against the door till I sat down on the floor. It didn’t matter that my white suit would be dirty. I didn’t care for being a superstar at this point.

I looked at the shiny trophy in my hands. It was beautiful and symbolized everything that a newcomer like me wanted. Almost everything.

At this moment, it stood for all I wanted…all except one.

I knew she was lying when she said all those cold words. I knew she was doing this for me. I also knew it was not fair of me to hold her back. She deserved better. She deserved to be free, happy and dancing where people would acknowledge her talent. She deserved the love of a man who could proudly show her off to the world.

I was not that man.

I held the trophy tightly and wished it could fill the void in my chest where my heart had been.

Yet, all that was left was cold plastic and a deep abyss of emptiness.

—————————————–

*Ji Hye’s POV*

I watched him as he went on stage and received the prize he deserved. He looked handsome and every bit the star in his sparkling white suit.

You did it. I am so proud of you.

I switched off the television and looked around the empty room as I sat on the bed that I had slept on since I came to Seoul. I scanned the room one last time to make sure I had taken everything.

If only I could really take everything with me.

My eyes fell to the side of the bed where he always slept when he crept up to me at night. I could almost feel him as I ran my fingers along the soft sheets.

A tear fell as I held the sheets tightly between my fingers.

Every corner of this room has traces of you.

I stood up and walked to the living room as I dragged my suitcase along.

You charged in here and claimed your right to my love.

As I passed the kitchen, I stopped at where we cooked.

You called me your wife as you laughed at my cooking.

I finally reached the front door where Yoo Chun had been waiting outside patiently.

I know you won’t show up at this door today like you always did because I chose the day where I knew you would be receiving the mark of your success.

“Are you ready?” Yoo Chun touched my shoulder gently as he took my suitcase for me.

I nodded with a smile.

I closed the door gently behind me as I stepped out of the house that had given me so many memories.

Farewell Seoul…

Goodbye Jae Joong.

—————————————————–

Author’s Notes:

The lyrics are quite important for this scene so here it is:

Somewhere Down The Road
Barry Manilow & Vonda Shepard Version

We had the right love
At the wrong time
Guess I always knew inside
I wouldn’t have you for a long timeThose dreams of yours
Are shining on distant shores
And if they’re calling you away
I have no right to make you stay

But somewhere down the road
I know that heart of yours
Will come to see
That you belong with me

Sometimes goodbyes are not forever
It doesn’t matter if you’re gone
I still believe in us together
I understand more than you think I can
You have to go out on your own
So you can find your way back home

And somewhere down the road
Our roads are gonna cross again
It doesn’t really matter when
But somewhere down the road
I know that heart of yours
Will come to see
That you belong with me

I had wanted to use the original Barry Manilow version where it was longer and had lines like “letting go is just another way to say I’ll always love you so” but I felt the mood of this duet version suited this scene better…

I think anyone who has gone through heartache or a breakup will know the last scene very well..I wonder if you guys saw the last scene as I did…the house a little dim, bluish…she walking out of the room having flashbacks as she goes from room to room…touching the furniture…running her fingers along the kitchen counter…sweetness blended with pain…I loved that scene.

In the course of writing, I learnt that sometimes as the author, one has to be cruel and I think I have been quite cruel to some of the characters…just look at what happened to my dear Yunho and Junsu sigh…

“So what is this concert about?”

“It is a big concert held by SMT. They hold this show annually where they invite the biggest stars of the moment for a combined concert. I am in charge of the whole show this time and I definitely need an assistant. You will be helping me with certain segments of the show so that the whole show can run smoothly.”

“There are so many people you can work with here. Why did you have to fly me back?” I tried catching up with his fast footsteps. He shot me a do-we-have-to-talk-about-this-again look.

“I have been working in LA and New York for most of the last few years. I have no time to look for people here. I need to work with people I trust.” He looked at me confidently. I appreciated the fact that he trusted me.

“Junsu, do you want to come with me tomorrow?” I turned behind and asked.

“Sure. I am curious about it too. My dad will only be back from the countryside the day after so I will be free anyway.” He was a filal son.

Seoul had changed a lot in the last few years. It was familiar and yet foreign to me at the same time. I had mixed feelings about being back again. These thoughts turned to happiness as I remembered some people that I would be seeing very soon.

———————————————————

*The Next Day*

“You will be okay on your own?” I asked with concern.

“Yes. You have work to do. I would like to explore around on my own too. I have never been inside an agency like this. I can take care of myself.” Junsu smiled assuringly.

“I will call you later then!” I exclaimed as I left with Yunho.

We walked down a long passageway of changing rooms in the main building of SMT. They had grown a lot over the last few years by grooming new talents and acquiring big names into their stable of artistes.

As we walked past the changing rooms, I paused as a sign on one of the doors caught my eye.

“HERO”

I froze.

“Ji Hye. What are you looking at? The others are waiting for us.” He shot a look at the sign and looked at me.

“Oh he will be involved in the concert too. Have you met him over the last few years?” Yunho asked casually.

“You didn’t tell me he would be involved.” I stared at him.

“Does it matter?” He retorted.

“No.” I looked away from him.

“You should have expected it. He’s big not only in Korea but all over Asia now.” He paused. “Did something happen to the two of you?”

“I don’t want to talk about it. Let’s go.” I quickly tugged Yunho’s arm as I heard the sound of the door opening.

“Bye Ri In!” A familiar voice arose behind me.

Instinctively, I darted to the nearest corridor I could find and ran down the flight of steps. I made sure I couldn’t be seen before I stopped and caught my breath.

“Ji Hye, what was that for?” Yunho complained as he panted from me dragging him along.

“Ah er…we were…we are late! Isn’t it time for us to move faster?” I stammered.

“You didn’t have to run! Anyway, the meeting room is just downstairs so we are in the right direction. How did you know it was here?” He looked at me curiously.

“Ah…um…woman’s instinct!” I felt like slapping myself for coming up with such a lame excuse.

“Anyway, let’s go.” Yunho led me down the stairs again.

*Boa’s POV*

“Jae Joong, what’s wrong? What are you doing here? We need to go.” Min Yong was starting to get irritated.

“What are you looking at?” I looked behind Jae Joong as I trailed behind Min Yong.

“Oh I..I just thought…I saw someone…I knew. Let’s go.” Jae Joong shrugged and started walking back to the main corridor with Min Yong. I looked around but saw no one he would be interested in seeing.

However, I spotted someone I didn’t expect to see as I stepped into the main corridor again.

“Jun..su?”

“Ah Boa! I haven’t seen you in a while!” He smiled widely at me. I had not seen that warm smile in a long time.

“What are you doing here?” I was surprised yet happy to see him.

“Oh I was just exploring the place since I have some free time.”

“How did you even get in here? Oh never mind.” I thought for a second. “You are free now? Want to go for some coffee?”

He wondered for a few seconds before he answered “Sure, let’s go.”

——————————————-

“I read from the news that you are with Jae Joong now.” Junsu asked as he stirred his coffee.

“The media has blown matter out of proportions. Don’t listen to their ridiculous claims.” I rolled my eyes.

“Have they given you any trouble?”

“There are people who got upset but it’s been surprisingly calm. The media is also a lot kinder than you know when…” My voice trailed off as I thought of her. He looked down with a bitter smile.

“You left without a word then…” I grasped my cup tightly.

“Yes. I should have said goodbye. I was in a rush. I am sorry about that.” He took a sip of his coffee.

“So what brings you back?” I asked softly.

“I came back with Ji Hye. I wanted to see my parents as well.” He placed his coffee back on the table as he looked at me.

“She’s back? I didn’t hear anything!” I looked at him in surprise.

“I am sure she was going to contact you. In fact, I was at the agency just now because I was accompanying her to a meeting.”

Jae Joong must have been running just now because he saw her.

“You guys came back together? How did…” I looked away as I asked him softly.

“Oh we have been staying together in Taiwan for the past one year. So when she said she was going to come back here to do an assignment, I decided to come back with her as well.”

“You guys are…staying together?” I muttered.

He smiled “Yes we are.”

—————————————————–

“Why were you running just now?” I asked Jae Joong as we sat in the changing room much later after I met Junsu.

“I just thought I saw someone I knew.” His eyes darted to the side.

“This someone doesn’t happen to be female right?”

“How did you…”

I took in a deep breath.

“She’s back.”

He turned to stare at me.

“Who…who are you talking about?” He tried to keep his composure.

“Admit Jae Joong. You thought you saw Ji Hye. Well you did see her because she was in the building just now.”

He stared at me as his mouth fell open.

“What is she doing back here?” He murmered to himself as he looked down.

“She’s back for the SMT concert…The concert you will be involved in as well.” I folded my arms and looked at him. He looked lost.

After a long break, he suddenly changed to a cool tone. “Well, it doesn’t matter if she’s back.”

“Really?” I asked suspiciously. “Then why did you run?”

“You don’t sound too happy.”

“Don’t try to change the topic Jae Joong. You do this everytime we talk about something you can’t answer.”

“I don’t want to talk about it. It’s none of my business.” He got up to leave the room.

“Well I suppose it is none of your business as well that she’s been staying together with Junsu for the last one year?”

He stopped with his back turned to me. His fists were clenched.

“No, it doesn’t matter.” He replied gravely as he kept his back to me.

My mind drifted to the conversation I had with Junsu earlier…

“You guys are…staying together?”

“Yes we are.” He smiled. “But it is not what you think. We merely share the apartment that’s all.”

“How did you guys end up sharing an apartment in Taiwan?”

“Ji Hye went back to her parents after she left Seoul three years ago. She stayed there for about half a year before she flew to the States and danced there for another one and a half years. We met accidentally when she accepted a job offer to teach in Taiwan. It was quite a miracle actually. I am working in my uncle’s restaurant and I am usually in the kitchen overseeing things but that particular day, I happened to be on the dining floor and we met there. She had come to our restaurant on a friend’s recommendation. Fate you might call it.” He laughed. “I thought you liked her.”